Gachapon Toys in Japan Are Wild!

Photos of the strangest capsule toys you can buy. Even a bird hugging bread?

A couple admiring all the gachapon choices. Photo- Rittis/Shutterstock.com

Gachapon or gacha gacha capsule toy machines have exploded in Japan.

They’ve been popular for years, but I kept seeing them everywhere in Osaka during my latest trip—entire store sections of them in malls and even at revolving sushi restaurants.

I was only away for three years, and now almost any kind of toy is in a gachapon.

They’re like gumball machines where you put your coins in and turn the knob, it makes a gacha gacha sound, and a plastic ball falls out with a toy inside. You pop it open and see which character or object you’re lucky enough to collect this time.

Each machine has a different toy theme based on anime characters or just about anything imaginable. Yup, there are plenty of gacha toy collectors hoping to find that missing character from their collection. It’s not just for kids. Adults love discovering their favorite gachapon wherever they go.

Most gachapon toys cost around three hundred yen each or roughly three dollars, which might sound expensive, but it doesn’t feel like it because you’re using coins.

There’s a one hundred yen coin, and dropping three of them in a gachapon feels easy and fun. I couldn’t resist taking photos of some of the more interesting toys available for your gacha gacha purchase.

Here’s a Naruto gachapon toy in my hand for size reference.

Who wouldn’t want birds hugging bread?

Cute animals are everywhere doing strange things. Maybe some of these are associated with manga or anime, or they’re mainly there to make you smile and wonder about their meaning.

Cute bears wrapped in food? Should you hug them or eat them?

Panda bread looks delicious!

Cute kitty cat pancakes. They don’t look very happy to me.

Aaaaah! Scary cats!!

Sometimes, the animals are busy doing one of their hobbies. Or waiting for you to squeeze them.

This one looks like a cat’s dream.

Nothing’s more relaxing than squeezing the life out of a cute squishy bird.

If you’re a foodie, I guess these gachapon toys might be something you could collect.

Oooh! The sashimi looks so fresh!!

Stackable burgers are so hot right now.

Wait. Is this even food?

I didn’t know furniture was an option for gachapon toys. If you’re into miniature models, these are for you.

Airplane seats that recline. Buckle your seatbelts.

I love the sophistication of this Karimoku collection. So rich!

I purposely avoided the standard cartoon character toys based on anime and manga you see everywhere. It was fun looking for ones that were creative and different.

I couldn’t resist these, though.

Mini Squid Game murderers for your keys.

You can get the whole bloody family!

If you visit Japan someday, make sure to get a few gachapon toys. They make great souvenirs and are fun to shop for while you’re sightseeing.

What creative capsule toys have you seen or bought?

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Meditating at a Mountain Temple in Japan

What you can learn from my adventure of mindfulness

All photos were taken by or illustrated by the author.

I like knowing I’m doing the right thing. Who doesn’t?

Making sure to meditate every morning is something I think I’m doing right, but I’m probably wrong. Accepting your biases and thinking your point of view may not be accurate is something I’m working on improving.

I can say, sitting in silence for 10–20 minutes first thing in the morning helps me face my emotions head-on. When it’s time to write or draw, it’s easier for me to plug into my creativity and get going.

There must be something to it.

I just recently returned from a phenomenal trip to Koyasan, a town on top of a mountain full of ancient Buddhist temples in the Kansai region of Japan. I’ve wanted to go for many years. Visiting my in-laws in Osaka allowed me to finally get close enough to make the overnight expedition happen.

Even if you’re not a practicing Buddhist, you can pray in the temples, as long as you throw a few coins in the donation bin before clapping your hands twice and bowing.

Getting up to the temples is no joke.

You can only take a cable car straight up the mountain. Beautiful views, but you definitely feel far removed from the regular world below.

I believe Kobo Daishi, the monk who established the town over a thousand years ago, meant it as a place for zen training and meditation. You can tell by the calmness all around the area.

Many of the original temples were burned down during wars or due to lightning strikes but rebuilt multiple times over the years and are gorgeous.

The temple we meditated in during our visit. The doors were open, but no pictures were allowed inside.

This is the temple next to the ryokan (Japanese traditional style hotel) we stayed in during our visit. The doors are closed now, but they were open for us to have an enjoyable meditation class inside in the morning.

You’re not allowed to take photos of the interior but believe me, the decorations were ornate and beautiful. We had two monks sharing how to pray and meditate.

I remember them mentioning sitting with your legs crossed with the left one under the right. Your hands are in your lap, palms up, with your left hand under your right as well. Somehow, you should close your eyes almost all the way shut, not fully closed, and look down at your nose.

They said this helps you focus more, but I kept closing my eyes after about twenty seconds.

We couldn’t be in the full crossed legs position because the monks had us sit on small benches inside the temple. Placing our hands together and breathing deeply for several minutes is something we could do while sitting.

Looking at my nose and holding my left hand under my right, palms up, helped me focus on being in the present moment. Now, when I’m at home practising, on the floor with my legs folded and my hands, I notice how much smoother I ease into deep meditation.

My mind wanders less at first.

Getting your body in the proper position and posture truly makes a difference. I knew sitting on the floor with my back straight helped before, but now I’m even more convinced stacking your hands and touching your thumbs together helps to center your mind.

The monks showed us that rocking side to side helps to loosen your body if sitting in the position is uncomfortable at first. I understood that even monks have days when sitting correctly may be difficult.

In the beginning, you can always find a way to make something work better for yourself.

Calligraphy writing was surprisingly meditative

We also practised writing calligraphy with a brush pen when we returned to our room. I couldn’t write Japanese, but it didn’t matter. I mainly had to trace.

The kanji characters were underneath; all you had to do was brush over them. The writing is about living a peaceful life, and the monks recited this during our meditation practice time. Writing with a brush pen was meditative and took more time than I thought, but I stuck with it.

I felt there was a lesson there.

The results of my calligraphy writing practice.

As a cartoonist, one of my favorite details about Koyasan, and just about everywhere in Japan, is how they have cute mascots.

This little monk character, Koyakun, was everywhere we went, giving advice and showing us around.

Koyakun was everywhere with helpful signs to guide you.

Koyasan monks practice Shingon Buddhism. Therefore, how they taught meditation goes along with how that particular sect practices.

Even with their advice, I still believe you can meditate any way you choose. It’s easier if you think about it openly and not full of strict rules.

You should start a meditation practice if you haven’t already. We hear some of the benefits of meditation, like more self-awareness and clear thinking, but is this true for everybody? The statistics would say so. In fact, a lot of folks are into “facing themselves” daily.

-It is believed that between 200 and 500 million people worldwide meditate.

-Data from the National Health Interview Survey in 2017 showed that 16.3% of women meditate, compared to 12% of men.

-The Headspace meditation app has been downloaded sixty-five million times. [10]

Meditation should be relaxing, so chill out about the correct way to do it

If you’d like to try meditation, I suggest relaxing your expectations with how you think it should look. Sometimes you can talk yourself out of something great because you feel it must be done a certain way. Like it would be best if you resembled a bald monk sitting cross leg with perfect posture for hours.

I try my best to sit their way, with my left leg under and right leg on top and hands in my lap palms up, but sometimes I sit in a chair.

The most challenging idea for me to accept is that it’s all about mindfulness and not how you sit. Being present when and where you are and noticing your body and thoughts.

That’s it, pretty simple.

Whether you’re doing this for ten minutes — which I think is the minimum amount of time to notice a difference — or an hour, you can focus on yourself anywhere. There are times when I’m stressed that stopping what I’m doing and taking three deep breaths helps to calm me down.

All the distractions in our modern world can block our thinking. You must deal with your emotions, swimming around, desiring your attention, and making space to work things out in your subconscious.

Meditating is genuinely part of a creative life. Add as much of it as possible to your day, and watch as you calm down and think clearly more often.

Of course, I could be wrong, but it’s the most specific change I made to my life over twenty years ago, and I continually see positive results. When life gets crazy, I meditate more.

Here are more stats if you need a push to get started.

-Research conducted in 2016 sought to discover the health benefits of meditation and understand the practice’s growth. Below is the list of reasons given for starting to meditate:

• General wellness (76.2%)

• Improving energy (60%)

• Aiding memory or concentration (50%)

• Anxiety (29.2%)

• Stress (21.6%)

• Depression (17.8%)

In the case of all the above conditions, 60% of the people questioned in the study reported that meditation helped them significantly.

-People who meditate can reduce their chance of being hospitalized for coronary heart disease by 87%. [10]

The groundbreaking research was initially conducted in 1989 and followed up fifteen years later to see if the mantra meditation was still working its magic.

It was found that the group who used the technique had a lower CV mortality rate than those who didn’t participate in the practice.

The 1989 project focused on 73 residents, and further research has backed up the finding; however, it is still felt further research is needed to understand the full effects.

They, just like me, could be wrong.

-But wait! Did you know that 25% of people who meditate report having an unpleasant psychological experience? [23]

I guess meditation isn’t for everyone. A study of 1,232 participants found that a quarter experienced adverse effects such as anxiety, fear, and distorted emotions.

Sure, the study might have been confirmed, but we have no idea what was going on in the lives of the people in this study at the time. You know I’m open to hearing other arguments, but I believe most people will feel positive benefits from regular meditation if they try it for a month or more, and this should be enough time to turn it into a habit.

Try meditating more and see how you feel

You don’t need to travel to Japan and ascend a mountain to practice meditation—hopefully, I helped you see that. When you practice, I bet you’ll appreciate my shared benefits.

I love how you can become more aware of what’s right for you when you meditate regularly. Your “still small voice” gets louder, and you make better decisions. Decisions that are based on what you truly desire.

Knowing how to pause before, say, picking your phone right up when notification dings and waiting to finish writing that page is what I love. You can have more control over yourself when you’re aware of what you’re doing.

Thanks for joining my Koyosan adventure and learning more about meditation.

How do you meditate?

3 Reasons to Turn Off the TV and Make Stuff Again

The power of producing for others can change your life for the better.

Illustrated by the author.

In the 1930s, thousands of people lined up to view the Dionne Quintuplets on display in a hospital nursery in Ontario, Canada.

Back then, no one knew having five babies at one time was possible—they had to see it to believe it.

The Canadian government passed a bill making the babies Yvonne, Annette, Cecile, Emilie, and Marie wards of the state. After all, how could one married couple possibly take care of so many babies at once?

Audiences paid to peek into display windows and watch the children grow up over almost ten years, putting half a billion dollars in the Canadian government's pocket.

People not only love to be entertained but awed. Seeing something fresh, groundbreaking, and new excites the imagination and creates envy in all your friends when you share your experiences.

It didn’t matter who you were. Celebrities came from far and wide to see the quintuplets in real life. Notable names at the time like Mae West, Jimmy Stewart, Clark Gable, and even a young future Queen Elizabeth II.

The Dionne quintuplets courtesy of Wikimedia Commons.

You may find it strange, or a bit twisted that people would pay to watch children through small windows at a hospital for enjoyment, but what else could they do?

Without the internet and television, radio and movies could only go so far. Plus, your choices were minimal in those days—no endless stream of shows and content like what we have now. You had to talk with friends, share stories around a fire or at the dinner table, play games, and actually go outside.

Using your imagination along with your social skills was vital.

What if you were a creator who desired to share your gifts with the world? Fat chance. One hundred years ago, there'd be limited outlets to share your passions and interests widely. You could be a local actor or musician in your town or risk your life traveling to New York or taking a boat overseas to Europe.

A century ago, providing for the basics—food, clothing, and shelter—was hard enough. Our world is more miniature thanks to the internet and media, but it's making people complacent.

Who needs to create or write their stuff when you can turn on the TV, look at your phone, or open a laptop anytime and be entertained?

When you think about some ridiculous videos people, watch on YouTube or vapid reality shows where people yell at each other that you can endlessly stream, it's not far off from watching five siblings playing in a room for entertainment. A lot of it is cruel and unethical.

Turn it off.

Let's say you're someone who works hard all day and wants to come home to a beer and several hours of watching screens. That's cool, some of the time.

We all need to kick back and relax here and there.

But what if you spent a bit of those TV watching hours creating something to inspire people who need what you offer? Perhaps you're a creator who gave it all up out of frustration.

I've been a cartoonist for over twenty years, with some hits but a ton more misses. Giving up and starting again is now a part of my backbone. If knocked down, you can come back to creating again, believe me.

Having so many choices for fun and amusement is fantastic, but I've discovered how the power of producing for others, no matter what you've been through, can change your life for the better.

Take a look at these three reasons to make time to share your talents.

1. Giving feels better than taking

Consuming content is exactly how it sounds—taking in and filling yourself without giving anything back. You're only working in one direction. It's my personal belief we're put here to give to the world more than we take.

If you look at it this way, figuring out what unique gifts you can share with the world is essential.

Very few people are fortunate enough to do what they love as a career. Add it to your life in some way.

You don't have to be on camera or pursuing internet fame and millions of rabid fans, but give yourself time each day to create something. Whether in the arts or being of service to others as a professional, helping your family or mentoring young people can help you give back in a fulfilling way.

2. Creating is its own reward

You don't need a large audience. Making or working on something that brings you joy is genuinely rewarding. A desire to improve, put in the work to get where you want to be, then you can share each step only if you choose.

Success and money aren't necessary. It's all about the making.

Sure, if you get so good, others can't help but notice you might have a hit on your hands, this may be a new direction to move into for success.

Enjoying doing what you love should be the primary goal, though.

I read a story about a young comedian who approached Jerry Seinfeld in a club one night and asked him for advice about marketing and exposure for his comedy career.

Hearing all this talk about exposure and marketing made Seinfeld feel queasy. He's a pure stand-up—a comedian's comedian. The legendary heads-down work ethic Seinfeld is known for giving the younger comedian the impression that's what he should ask about to get ahead. Nope.

"Just work on your act," Seinfeld said.

3. Building your legacy instead of others

There's nothing wrong with being remembered as someone who worked long hours providing for their family—making a better life for the people you love is an impressive accomplishment.

Think about if you're fortunate enough, like many people in the U.S., to have the means to pursue a craft or art skill to bring joy to others.

Your passions will be remembered and passed down through your family, inspiring future generations. It's not only about being remembered but leaving something more than money as your legacy.

Don't spend all your attention on something someone else built. Put time into making something your ancestors can be proud of after you're gone. Look, we all love Star Wars, but there are plenty of fans of that franchise.

Create yours.

Giving with your art makes it clear to others there's more out there than just working a job. You're here to inspire people, enjoy life, and show them you care for what's possible beyond endless hours of earning money to pay the bills.

Find your platform and express yourself

With our modern privilege, we can choose to watch the endless array of mindless, borderline embarrassing content out there but also use it to give back and make others feel awe.

Decide if you want to create in private or share it with your family or the world online. Your platform doesn't have to be a website destination—it can be in person.

Even if you feel like an amateur, you can inspire and thrill others with your creativity and positive energy.

One of the things I enjoy about making comic strips is knowing I can give someone I've never met before a laugh. Even if my work isn't hilarious, I like that I can bring a little joy to someone who might need it that day. It makes all the work hours feel like they matter to someone over just me.

Not sure what you can share with others?

• Find a dance class or group to groove with and work out your frustrations through music and movement.

• Write articles about topics that interest you and can help others learn new skills. Publish them on Medium and social media sites and observe the feedback you receive to shape how you grow and move forward.

• Make a goal to fill a sketchbook with drawings of what you see around you. Sketch the people in your life. Then, share photos online of your finished pages.

• Learn a new instrument or practice songs on the one you play well, then try writing songs you could share.

• Be that listening ear for friends and family who need support. Giving your time to be fully present for others is a crucial skill to master.

Turning off the TV more and making time for creativity and care for others is your ticket to a fulfilling life.

Give more and see how each day gets better.

Subscribe to my A New Creative Life newsletter to discover how to live a creative life.

https://khalidbirdsong.substack.com/

There Are Two Ways to Admire Successful People- Only One is Right

Be honest. Would you do what it takes to be as good?

Photo by Obie Fernandez on Unsplash

Success is easy for them. They're naturally talented and famous. Why couldn't I be born with such exceptional skills?

I bet that's what you're thinking when reading a book by an author you admire or watching an actor play their role superbly, and it fills you with admiration.

Perhaps, even jealousy. You want what successful people have but feel you're not ready yet. Or maybe you'll never get there.

As a writer, cartoonist, and teacher, I have friends who have succeeded further than I have and others who haven't, for various reasons. Of course, the ones who have done well have me envious of their accomplishments.

I use the word envy because jealousy sounds like I'm unhappy or upset with them—quite the contrary. I'm excited when people succeed in the arts and get to where they want to be.

I do feel it's essential to put it into perspective, though. When you see someone doing well, it looks easy. We know there's no way it's as easy as they make it look, but still, we think it's beyond our reach due to some unknown advantage they have.

Take a look at these two ways to think about what they've accomplished.

Which one are you?

1. Natural talent created their good luck

"That writer is so talented. There's no way I could ever be as good as them."

Guilty. I've uttered this phrase. Sometimes I believe it must be nice to be born with natural talent and ability, making creativity easy.

Cheering for your favorite basketball player is the same idea: natural talent can't be ignored.

In your mind, natural talent is all it takes, and you tell yourself that to avoid the uncomfortable truth.

Getting good takes hard work.

Sure, that sports star practices regularly, but they're doing it full-time. It's their job to be good, and you don't have that luxury, so it's not your time yet.

You have to work a day job and find time to practice what you love after taking care of all your responsibilities. It's so much harder.

I often feel helpless thinking about how much better I could be with more time to work on writing and drawing each day. It's easy to be envious of people who look like they were born great and have endless free time.

If you ain't got it, you ain't got it. You can make that your excuse to stop trying and sit back and watch, read, and be as jealous as you'd like because they're more special than you'll ever be unless there's more to their success than you initially thought.

2. Many years of hard work created opportunities

Talent is only one part of their astounding skill. What helps is commitment and consistency for success.

Admire their hard work as well as their talent. Successful people commit to something important to them, not only for a few months but for many years. Most likely ten or more. A lifetime even.

Putting all that time into something you're not sure will pay off is a risk. Even if it doesn't work out the way they planned, successful people know to pivot and put their efforts into something else until one of their pursuits turns into a viable business or career.

Trial and error is no fun; you must keep your mental state strong and become comfortable with uncertainty. Can you do that?

Luck does play a part, I'll admit. Meeting the right people who can put you in better situations to shine is an ingredient. Being prepared from working on your craft for years helps. If you're not ready to play in the big leagues, it could all fall flat—luck or not.

Maintaining success when you get it is also a challenge. Everyone can't keep a cool head when they're suddenly hitting it big and making more money than they ever imagined. Surrounding yourself with good people and pacing yourself can help the good times remain sustainable.

Admire the work, not the fame

I understand that you want everything you put a lot of effort into to succeed without fail, but that's not possible. If you want to achieve, you have to learn to deal with the highs and lows.

All the successful people you're envious of certainly are.

Become a person interested in making it big through consistent practice, treating others with respect, and staying positive even when reality looks bleak.

Be someone to admire by putting in the work even when life is hard, and there are zero opportunities. You'll reap the rewards, even if it's not how you imagined.

Want more? If you're struggling with doing original work, click here to join my (free) email list, and through comics, articles about culture, and living your truth, you can upgrade your mindset and share your art with the world.

Why You Should Practice The Boring Stuff When You’re Young.

And 3 ways to love the fundamentals and master your craft when you’re older.

Photo by Kaizen Nguyễn on Unsplash

“I don’t need to practice [insert art skill]. This is just my personal style.”

How many times have I heard that from my art students? Way too many times.

If you want to get good, you have to learn to love practicing the fundamental skills of your craft when you’re young. Whether that’s in visual art, music, sports, or, yes, even writing.

It doesn’t get easier with time.

Getting good means knowing what good means. And that takes experience.

You learn by growing through repetitive practice in stuff you, at a young age, can’t see as important right now. Passing your lack of experience off as a style trait is lazy and misguided.

When you’re in school and even into your twenties, you have more energy than you know what to do with. Why make excuses for putting in the work as a creative? I bet it’s because you don’t have a coach riding your a$$ every day to write for two hours, or practice drawing portraits.

You can bet athletes hire or must attend a certain number of practices each week to stay in shape and keep their sporty skills in tip-top condition. I also bet there’s no way they would practice that much without someone holding them accountable.

But what if you can’t hire an art or writing coach? You’ve got to be the one who motivates yourself to keep going no matter how old you are.

Once you get decent at the basics, we can talk about flipping them on their head and claiming you can practice less because it’s your style. At least, that’s what I say when teaching art to middle school students. They want it to be easy right now, and it doesn’t work like that, unfortunately.

You may even be older and know how important it is to practice but still can’t get yourself to work on the boring stuff you know will grow your skills.

One thing young people don’t understand is how heavy responsibilities, like raising children, and dealing with surprise health issues, not to mention being just plain tired, make it so much harder to put in time practicing skills as you age.

No worries. All it takes is a mindset shift and a little creativity. Treat it like you’re young—fresh-faced and open to discovering more of how basic skills can improve your work.

You don’t have to love practicing the fundamentals, but you have to work on them regularly to improve.

Here’s what I tell young creatives that can also help my over-forty crowd, who need help consistently doing the things to improve their work.

Make it a game to get fully engaged

Creating your art, drawing or writing should be something you enjoy no matter what, right? I’ll give you a hardy WRONG on that one! Yes, making whatever you feel like when you’re in the mood is enjoyable, but if you want to improve, you have to work even when you’re not feeling it.

Gamify your practice times to incentivize learning the boring stuff that makes you cringe. Use your creativity to make learning the basics fun, and it will be easier to want to sit down and get to work.

Let’s say you need to improve your skills in drawing hands, and what artist doesn’t? You sit down and challenge yourself to draw five hand gestures in your sketchbook in twenty minutes. Set a timer and see if you can beat it.

Figure drawing practice within thirty minutes.

Even if you’re practicing playing scales on an instrument—not the most fun activity but important—use a similar method. How many can you do in a limited time? Can you play them in several different rhythms like a song?

Becoming a better writer takes, well, writing often. Challenge yourself to see how many days a week you can write for a specific amount of time. Try one hour a day at the same time of day. Or, give yourself a word count, like 500 words each day, mark a calendar when you complete them, and on Sunday, see if you’ve won.

The act of spicing up your fundamentals will help make sitting down to do them more fun. Unfortunately, gamifying is not enough. Naturally, we all want something when we win.

Reward yourself sweetly to make winning fun

When you reach your gamified goal, reward yourself with a treat — whatever that is for you. I love eating chocolate chip cookies. Sweet treats are a solid motivator for me, and I feel like I truly won an award when I get a treat afterward.

The other day, it was hard for me to focus on writing. So, I got some of those Mini Chips Ahoy cookies as motivators. They’re small so I could eat one after ten minutes of writing. Chewing on it with a smile as I write more, then after ten minutes put another in my mouth. Writing and eating treats as I go.

Not great for my waistline, I know, but I got through finishing an article. And drank a big glass of almond milk after.

You may decide you can’t watch your favorite TV show until you’ve drawn something for an hour or two. Pick the things you really do not feel like practicing, and add your best reward treat to completing them successfully.

I enjoy knowing I can draw whatever I want if I put in a certain amount of time on fundamentals. That could mean drawing three figure drawings, then a funny cartoon character.

The harder and more boring the skill, the better the reward. You’ll be getting fundamental practice easier and more often.

Drawing bunnies is a lot of fun after figure drawing practice.

Upgrade your thinking to always keep going

If you’re dedicated to your chosen art form, you must learn to work with the difficult and boring parts as well as what’s enjoyable. They do go hand in hand. Even if you’re doing it mainly for fun, you’ll want to get better, telling yourself improvement doesn’t matter is a waste of time.

When you get up to go to work or school, you have to mentally prepare for the day. Why? Because it’s important. You know there will be a mix of great and not-so-great, but you take it on as a part of the experience. Do the same with your art and creative work.

Know it will be hard at times, especially when you’ve got family or health challenges, but the hard stuff makes you better and pushes you ahead. If it feels too easy, too fun, you’re probably not growing. Look for the obstacles. Find ways to work on the difficult parts because you know you need it to improve.

Doing this sort of mind shift, especially when you’re young, will help you make it a habit you continue into older age. You set a precedent that growing as a creative person takes doing the parts you enjoy and the parts that help you grow.

Trying to get yourself to do what you know you must when you’re older is harder. You become more set in your ways, and life responsibilities make it easier for you to make excuses not to create. When you have a mindset of creating regularly set in your brain, getting started, even if times are tough, is easier.

When you seek out creative challenges, find fun ways to work on them regularly, and reward your accomplishments, the boring stuff won’t be boring anymore.

Want more? If you’re struggling with doing original work, click here to join my (free) email list, and through comics, articles about culture, and living your truth, you can upgrade your mindset and share your art with the world.

Two Words That Make Success Easier

This is what it takes to get where you want to be.

Photo by Andrew Neel on Unsplash

Don’t be fooled by quick and easy success stories. Making it big takes a lot of hard work.

It’s even more hard work than you think because success involves getting out of your own way.

I know you want to believe you can stay the same, and luck will bless you and suddenly change your life for the better, but this is juvenile thinking. Growing up and realizing that you have to put in time and effort to succeed is significant.

Success takes two essential ingredients most people run away from like the plague—even if they know working hard is a primary key.

I’ve lived a pretty good life, worked as a writer, artist, and teacher, and even traveled the world. Without two truths, I could have never done all that I did and plan to continue doing in the future.

If you can get navigate pushing through these two words, success can be more effortless for you to attain.

1. Failure

As a writer and cartoonist, naturally, I’m a fan of animated films, especially ones made by Disney. You may feel like everything the company does has always been a success.

So not true.

The Walt Disney Company has had successes and failures over its almost 100-year history. Slow times and fast. But it kept figuring out ways to keep going because they understood disappointment is a part of taking risks and doing business. Walt ingrained this idea into the studio.

Before Walt Disney started the company with his brother Roy, an editor at a newspaper he worked for told him he lacked imagination and had no good ideas. I bet that pissed him off a bit but gave him the fuel needed to prove him wrong.

“I think it’s important to have a good hard failure when you’re young… Because it makes you kind of aware of what can happen to you. Because of it I’ve never had any fear in my whole life when we’ve been near collapse and all of that. I’ve never been afraid.”

-Walt Disney

You have to be willing to try and fail. Yes, you may look like an idiot or embarrass yourself, but what you’ll learn will help you make new and different choices next time.

If you look at failure as a part of the learning process, something you need to get better and discover what works, you can use it.

People who never fail never really try.

You don’t have to like it, but make friends with it so you can reach your goals.

2. Discomfort

No one knows how to face discomfort like stand-up comedians. I may love writing humor in a comic strip format and have to face the possibility my readers won’t laugh at the joke, but I don’t have to meet them in person.

One of my favorite comedians is Jerry Seinfeld. Not just because he was able to get a hugely successful TV show with his name on it, but because he has a unique style and delivery, and most importantly, he never uses curse words.

That’s tough to do.

After his first set doing stand-up as a young comedian on the circuit, I read that it didn’t go well. Seeing the audience made him freeze when he set foot on stage, and he was booed off.

Think about it. Seinfeld could have said “Screw this!” packed his bags, and left that world forever.

Instead, he decided to get over himself and make success as a comedian more important than his discomfort on stage. I bet he could tell it was something he could get over if he practiced more. If writing jokes gets easier the more you do it, so can dealing with standing up on stage.

Of course, we all know how that turned out. Jerry Seinfeld was right to keep working through the discomfort.

Truthfully, it’s still uncomfortable for me to put my work out there, but I’ve learned to get used to that awkward feeling. You have to know that not being comfortable means you’re growing. The skills you’re learning, or the way you’re thinking about something new are being stretched.

Even though that’s a good thing, it’s only up to you to decide to keep facing discomfort head-on.

Make a point to try new things to get comfortable with being uncomfortable.

Talk to random people on the street and ask them questions about their life, volunteer to present new ideas during meetings at work, put your writing out online wherever you can, and brace yourself for criticism.

Doing what you fear will build up your tolerance for it and make it easier over time.

“According to most studies, people’s number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. Death is number two. Does that sound right? This means to the average person, if you go to a funeral, you’re better off in the casket than doing the eulogy.”

- Jerry Seinfeld

Getting good is the real secret

The main reason to grow more decisive in dealing with failure and discomfort is to get better at doing your craft. People want to read, watch, and hear good quality work, and if you make stuff and make it well, they’ll notice.

It’s incredible how easy it can be to give up because we can’t handle things not going the way we think they should. You will win when you give yourself the space to fail and feel like crap, but get back up and keep making—even if your success takes years.

If there’s one thing we can’t deny, it’s high-quality work. Good writing, beautiful music, and clever ideas get noticed, even if we’re unsure why it’s so great.

A combination of daily work, to get better, then facing your fears to put it out there can make a difference. When one of my articles gets a lot of attention or a comic strip receives many positive comments, I know I connected with people.

Even if that doesn’t happen for every piece, I put out, I know continuing to produce, learn, and iterate will help give me more chances at success.

It’s never just luck, even though luck can help. Working through setbacks and challenges will get you where you want to be in the long run.

Your success in life is proportional to how much risk and discomfort you can handle. Now get out there and fail more.

Want more? If you’re struggling with doing original work, click here to join my (free) email list, and through comics, articles about culture, and living your truth, you can upgrade your mindset and share your art with the world.

Why Elon Musk Thinks Japan is Doomed

Making babies isn’t easy when you have out-of-date thinking.

Image courtesy of Wikimedia Commons.

Japan’s population needs to grow faster, or it will cease to exist.

At least, this is what billionaire Elon Musk believes. Japanese people need to start making more babies for the country to survive. I agree, but I think it’s more complicated.

Living in Japan for several years as an English teacher taught me a lot about the culture. Being married to a Japanese woman and then visiting from America regularly over the past twenty years gives me an inside and an out-of-the-box view of the issues.

Even with this knowledge, I was surprised by Elon’s tweet.

Screenshot of Elon Musk’s comment on the Kyodo News article.

According to this article, he comments on; the birth rate has been a problem for many years now. I remember the Japanese government even pays people a thousand dollars, maybe more, to have a baby in the city of Osaka.

I’m not sure they can pull themselves out of this any time soon, but I don’t think Japan will “Cease to exist” in the way Elon thinks. But they need to change their views on what it means to be Japanese and adapt to the modern world.

Marriage and parenting in Japan is a trap

Young people run away from marriage in Japan like crazy because you have to give up so much of your freedom. How is this different from everywhere in the world?

Most likely, old-world thinking and rigid gender roles.

In Japan, you live in prescribed roles to fit into society, and you’re expected to follow the rules of those roles.

It’s like 1950s America on steroids.

If you’re a husband working in a company as a salaryman, you must give all your life to your job and do everything your boss tells you, even if that involves going out for drinks until 11 pm after work each night. There’s a good chance you won’t have time for your wife or kids, and no one cares if you’re unhappy with that reality.

Overwork and sacrificing your health are how you show respect to Japan and its culture. This is why business people randomly sleeping on trains or park benches are seen as hard workers and well respected.

If you’re a woman, you’re expected to quit your job when you have children. At least you can keep your job after marriage now. A Japanese teacher I worked with while living there in her fifties said years ago that she quit her job to be a full-time housewife when she first got married. It was incredibly dull, and her husband worked all the time. She was lonely every day, wondering why she got married in the first place.

Raising kids is traditionally supposed to be for mothers without full-time jobs. If you work as a mother, it’s incredibly unfair because you’re expected to take care of all the household responsibilities, cooking, cleaning, even managing the finances, around your job, and taking care of the kids. The husband is expected just to work and be taken care of by his wife.

This is acceptable—not liked by most—but a part of Japanese culture. It’s no surprise that people there are against marriage and having children.

Japan needs more foreigners

When they’re open to more people from many other countries coming in and having a fair chance to live and succeed in Japan, their population will grow. Not just by the influx of new immigrants, but with them marrying Japanese people and, in turn, having more children.

Closing itself off to the world has always been a part of Japanese history. Seeing themselves as unique and unlike any other country has caused too many issues to discuss here.

When you live in Japan as a non-Japanese person, you are consistently treated like and looked at as an outsider. You can’t come there, live for twenty years there, and be accepted as an equal citizen.

You’re always seen as a foreigner.

After two years of living in Osaka, I was fed up with working my butt off learning the language and cultural rules, only to realize because I’m a Black man, I will never be seen as Japanese.

If someone moves to the U.S., they may deal with discrimination for being from another country, but they can become “American over time.” Not so in Japan.

What makes a Japanese person as far as physical looks need to get upgraded. In America, we know Americans can look like many races, and Japan can grow in this area if they make it easier for non-Japanese people to get a visa and live, work, and start businesses.

Of course, this means that Japanese people will look more mixed-race as more foreigners mix with the population over the next ten to twenty years, but if this helps the country open its minds and grow, it might survive.

News outlets in Asia have been talking about this for what feels like forever. I’m no immigration expert, but I’ve lived abroad enough to know opening up your borders can positively affect countries.

I love Japan, but Japanese people have to gradually embrace that their society and ideals need to change to make it in the end. Being incredibly shy and insular is hurting the country.

Let’s hope that if more prominent voices like Elon Musk point out the challenges Japan faces, Japanese citizens can change their views so future generations will flourish.

Want more? If you’re struggling with doing original work, click here to join my (free) email list, and through comics, articles about culture, and living your truth, you can upgrade your mindset and share your art with the world.

3 Reasons to Stop Caring About Making Money From Writing

Share your work for free as often as you can.

Illustration by the author.

Writing only for money is a waste of time.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting to earn dollars for your articles or sell millions of copies of your book—it shouldn’t be your main goal, though.

As a writer, teacher, and cartoonist, I’ve spent the past twenty years making money from what I love and also putting a ton of creative work out for free. The free stuff I shared was more fun and fulfilling than when I was paid mainly because I could do what I wanted and didn’t have to worry about pleasing anyone.

Rarely was I able to mix making money with something I had a passion for, like my comic strip Little Fried Chicken and Sushi. The strip started as a free webcomic about my experiences living in Japan, and I posted it online for four years, then it got syndicated online by Andrews McMeel Publishing.

Creating the comic was a labor of love, and I enjoyed the freedom to write my story and characters however I wanted. The delightful combination of writing and drawing together, which every cartoonist loves, stayed for many years, even with a wider audience reading.

I learned what it takes to consistently create content every week for years. One thing always rang true—you can’t only care about making money. Here are several ways to focus less on your bank account and more on the pleasure of writing.

1. Write because it’s fun

You get more out of it when you write for the joy of writing. Even if you’re someone in dire straits, who must get paid asap, get a job, any job to help pay your bills, to keep that joy alive while writing on the side. Don’t worry, your creativity will keep on popping.

Art is about creating for the sake of just that, creation.

We live in a time where you have the ability and means to create because it’s fun. There are still plenty of places on this planet where people are struggling in their living conditions or are in the middle of surviving a war.

If you’re reading this, there’s a good chance you have the opportunity to make stuff where and when you want. People in your family tree are smiling at all they worked hard to accomplish so you can have the freedom to write.

Work a job, write on the side until something connects with readers, and you can eventually leave it if you choose.

You’re not alone as someone who wants a successful career as a writer. It’s not uncommon for literary agents to receive anywhere from five thousand to twenty thousand query letters from authors seeking representation for their book manuscripts each year. Only a handful make it to a release through a major publishing house.

I’m not saying this to bring you down, just to throw a dose of reality onto your fire.

Whether you’re a successful writer or not, you will continue writing. I’ve had ups and downs, and still, I draw and write every day. Writing articles like this one feels good, and I also enjoy laughing when I finally come up with a funny gag for a comic strip.

I have a relationship, or marriage, with my creative interests that will last no matter how well I’m doing financially. I’ve been broke making my art and also know what it’s like to get a salary from making my art.

Both situations required I work continuously on improving my skills by doing the work. You’ve got to find the fun in creating daily to keep going even when times are tough.

2. Write to help others

Writing for yourself is fine, and if you’re working on a novel, it can be pretty rewarding. Creating stories that inspire others or articles to help people learn and grow in their lives can bring more fun to your writing practice.

Putting your work out into the world for free as often as possible will help you get noticed. When you inspire others, bringing value to people, even one person, you will reap the benefits.

Sometimes, it’s just one thank you email response or comment on your article from someone you helped. You’re instantly connected and feel a sense of true purpose. So, it’s not always money that motivates. Glowing with the knowledge, you helped another person—or thousands—get what they want out of life or feel more a part of theirs is transformational.

Not everyone can buy your books or pay to read what you’ve written online. Thanks to the internet, giving it away for free online makes it accessible to all and can reach more people who need your words.

You’ll be surprised at how much helping others helps you.

3. Write to heal yourself

I hear creatives whining about how difficult it is to write. If it’s so hard, why write at all? You could be watching TV or playing video games.

Could it be writing helps you feel better? It helps you process events in your life and understand your place in it? Maybe that’s a good reason to push through the pain of a problematic article draft or the frustration of a paragraph not coming together how you hoped.

Writing puts the pieces together in your mind and can mend your heart.

Does this sound like something that needs money to be worthwhile? You, putting your whole self into what you create makes it special.

Creating is never a waste of time, no matter how disappointed you may become with your results. You may think burnout or giving up on writing happens when you work too much. Actually, investing emotionally and then not getting a return on your investment is the problem.

When you can accept your mental healing as a valuable return, your fulfillment for helping others, and enjoyment with the process of writing as payment for your time, you’ll feel more satisfied.

Did you notice I didn’t highlight much about how writing all the time helps your skills grow? I’m sure you already know. Actually, it could be a whole article of its own. If you want to get better at something, do it every day. One more key to add is to do it with the intention of getting better.

And you will.

If something you wrote takes off, garners millions of readers, and makes you boatloads of money, magnificent. The rewards will taste sweeter because you know you did it for love, not money.

Want more? If you’re struggling with doing original work, click here to join my (free) email list, and through comics, articles about culture, and living your truth, you can learn to share your art with the world.

Watching People Litter in London Inspired This Easy Happiness Hack

Getting rid of the garbage in your mind without hesitation makes a huge difference.

Photo by Sabrina Mazzeo on Unsplash

Did he just dump his entire lunch onto the street?

I recently visited London for the first time and fell in love with the city and its people. There’s a charm that grabbed me, and history, with a bit of clotted cream on the side, keeping it on my mind. If you haven’t been, you should go. Escaping America again soon to experience more British culture is most definitely in the cards.

The only part of the trip that surprised me was how many people littered. Not just gum wrappers or small store receipts, but all the garbage in their pockets and more lying about on the streets.

I watched a man stop at a red light, open his car door, and throw all of his fast-food trash—his paper bag of food and cup of soda—out onto the street, then keep driving when the light turned green—no concern about the environment. No worries.

Garbage cans were hard to come by, but I wondered why people couldn’t keep their trash with them until they found one. Or, wait until they got home?

Big cities require you to walk and take public transportation, so you might not feel like trekking around all day with your garbage, so you drop it to lighten your load.

Getting rid of actual trash any time, anywhere, is a terrible thing to do. As a lover of metaphors, this made me think of the emotional baggage—or junk—we continually carry around and never get rid of in our lives.

What if we treated our trauma and emotional issues like the trash we must dump immediately? Not onto random strangers or everyone we know, but making a point to feel and process our emotions, then talk to good friends and therapists to help us unload our crap.

I like to call it “Positive littering for the mind," a more immediate way to get back to happiness.

To do it, though, you have to take an honest look at what you’re carrying.

The author in London by the Thames river and parliament.

Recognize your garbage

Sightseeing in London was jolly good fun. We stayed in an Airbnb apartment close to parliament and could walk over to the river Thames within ten minutes to view Big Ben and the London Eye Ferris wheel.

One of my favorite experiences was watching the changing of the guard at Buckingham Palace. They even had a marching band playing familiar songs like Phantom of the Opera and the Spiderman theme.

Taking in all the sites and over one thousand years of history hits you with awe for the beauty and culture, respect for what they’ve built, and anger at the atrocities of colonialism.

You have to face plenty of mixed emotions and serious issues when you make a point to look at what’s in front of you.

That’s why most people push their feelings down deep and ignore them. They won’t go away if you turn your back or stuff them somewhere in your heart. Yes, negative emotions like fear, shame, and disappointment are uncomfortable, but you have to feel them if you want them to dissipate.

Name these dark and deep emotions. Call them out. Or, at least think about why you’re feeling this way and what led to them. Knowing what you’re carrying can help you release later.

When I visit my inlaws in Japan, there are very few garbage cans when we’re out and about. People there tend to hold on to their trash, keeping it in their bags, purses, or pockets while walking. Therefore, I do the same.

You’re very aware you’re carrying your garbage, which can be pretty annoying.

It’s so satisfying when you get to a garbage can at the subway station or home and can dump it all out. After carrying it for a while, you’re very aware of all you have and enjoy watching it go where it belongs.

Throw your garbage out as soon as possible

I saw people in London littering, but I didn’t see a lot of litter on the ground. Apparently, it’s a big problem there, but they must have plenty of city workers hired to clean it all up regularly. I expected to see more garbage than I did.

It would be best to take them out once you see your issues and accept them—name them as garbage.

This is where “Positive littering for the mind” comes in, and you can do it all in your head. It may feel like a stretch for some of you but stick with me here.

Visualize yourself taking that issue or problem and throwing it in the garbage. Ball it up into a big wad of wrinkled papers in your mind and feel those uncomfortable emotions. They won’t feel good but don’t hide from them.

See yourself letting it go into a huge can. You can even use hand motions to throw it into the trash with force. The relief once your garbage hits bottom will be all the sweeter. You faced your trash and threw it out.

You cleaned out your mess.

Does this solve all your emotional problems? No. And I’m no licensed therapist or psychiatrist, but I am a middle school teacher and creative guy who’s been through a lot of crap. This method works for me and helps strengthen my tolerance for facing challenging emotions.

If you don’t have time at the moment to do this, take time to meditate in the morning or before bed, and visualize taking out your mental trash.

Keep moving forward in life with honesty and help

I know severe trauma and painful parts of childhood are not easy to ball up and throw in the trash with your imagination. This method works on milder emotions or immediate feelings best. Making sure to see a therapist and work on talking through your serious issues that may be causing the smaller ones to feel more extreme is essential.

Of course, talk therapy is scary too. Getting to a place where you can face what’s holding you back or causing negative emotions is a step towards healing and getting help for more profound issues.

You don’t want to litter your emotional baggage all over everyone, but you should have a goal to get to a place where you can openly express your feelings and talk to people who can help you heal. If not, moving forward in life will be a significant challenge.

The next trip to London will be a welcome adventure and one I’m more prepared to face now that I’ve visited once before. I know how to get around and better understand how the city is laid out.

Just like facing your emotional baggage, you get more confident with experience. I highly recommend world travel, especially to the U.K., but you don’t have to go overseas to start healing your mind and heart.

You can do that right now, with a bit of self-awareness and quiet time.

Disclaimer: I am not a licensed therapist or psychiatrist. Please use my advice at your discretion and see a professional if you’re suffering from severe depression.

Want more? If you’re struggling with doing original work, click here to join my (free) email list, and through comics, articles about culture, and living your truth, you can upgrade your mindset and share your art with the world.

Don’t Feel Bad About Not Starting Your Side Hustle

Why living through a pandemic is the right reason to slow down.

Photo by Aleksandra Sapozhnikova on Unsplash

I believe in working a job and having another money-making venture on the side, but it’s not always as easy as people make it seem.

If you’ve survived the Covid pandemic, stop and look at what you’ve accomplished. Do you have a job paying the bills right now? Congratulations! You’re much better off than most people.

Are you physically healthy and in decent shape? Another win.

Even though it’s hard to hear, you’re most likely emotionally and mentally damaged after surviving a worldwide pandemic. Hearing about people dying every day, maybe even family members, and doing what you can to keep the virus at bay and, at the same time, food on the table takes herculean effort.

Adding a side business to all of that takes serious consideration after everything we’ve been through in the world.

What do you want out of life?

The unprecedented times we’ve lived through have now become precedented times. Fortunately, because of vaccines and people being more willing to take them, life improves steadily.

Let’s hope we can gradually move back to some semblance of normalcy in the next few years. As a teacher, writer, and cartoonist, I’m choosing to build up my writing and drawing skills with the awareness it can be easy to crash and burn if I do too much.

You have to decide what you can handle in your specific circumstances right now, which might not include—let’s be honest—more work.

What would you get out of your side hustle?

Your “why” should be about more than money. Even if you’re in bad financial shape and need to make some dough to catch up on bills, you should have meaningful goals attached to it as well.

Freelance writing is an easy example. You can make money writing for clients doing blog posts, case studies, and copywriting. Freelancing has its challenges, but you’re growing and improving as a writer.

I loved freelance writing as my side hustle pre-pandemic while teaching Art full-time. Finding jobs on Upwork was tricky at first, but I figured it out and smiled my way through icky clients. But I also had fun with wonderful ones, learning more about business writing, and growing a more impressive writing portfolio.

One of my goals was to eventually transition from teaching into copywriting for a tech company or full-time freelancing. Accepting that desire helped me keep going when I was tired or didn’t feel like writing after work. Three years of side hustling went by, and recruiters started taking notice of my case studies on Linkedin. I was able to move into a position as a copywriter for a tech company.

I learned a lot from experience over almost two years until the pandemic hit. The company let me go, and I was unemployed for a few months and moved back to teaching. Learning to teach from home was a huge challenge and took a ton out of me.

All of us had to learn to work differently. Doing your job remotely from home is a dream for others and a nightmare for some. I had my daughter at home and had to help with her remote schooling while attempting to keep up with my teaching.

It was hard. I barely made it through, but I get to decide how to proceed, and so do you.

“The action you take today will secure your tomorrow and have its repercussions. The pandemic will frizzle out and get over someday shortly, but the survivors remain. And remember we aim now at ‘safeguarding lives’ and ‘safeguarding livelihood’.”

― Henrietta Newton Martin , Legal Advisor & Author

Can you do it without killing yourself?

I burned out from working too much during a pandemic while balancing parenting. It wasn’t like before when all I had to think about was how early to wake up to write and draw and make sure to rest on the weekends. Pandemic life changed me, and I had to take parts of my busy life off my plate to survive.

Post pandemic, side hustling looks different. Your other jobs or extra business might take a toll you don’t expect and hit you with health problems. Is it worth it?

If your side hustle happens to be something you’re passionate about, like acting or drawing, working for clients forces you to do something in that area you usually wouldn’t. This can be a good thing.

We all have certain parts of what we love we’re afraid to try. A business you’re working for will pull you out of your comfort zone, requiring you to do things you’ve been avoiding. You can learn to face discomfort.

Scary, but necessary if you want to grow. What if you feel like you don't have the capacity and are not ready to take on more? Should you put on Gary Vee podcasts yelling at you to get your hustle on? Maybe, just like most humans, he’s wrong sometimes too.

The only one who can tell you what’s right for you right now is you.

About a year ago, I remembered a popular saying, “Give yourself some grace.” If you’re not ready to stretch yourself yet, let your side hustle goals go for now.

Growing in your chosen passion is essential, and I strongly believe in facing your fears to get better at what you love. But it will tire you out.

If what you’re looking to get out of a side hustle feels like an incredible weight combined with everything else right now, leave it alone. Taking time to recharge your batteries is most important.

When you know why you want to work outside of your job, you can better understand what you can handle. Eventually, you can start—or continue—your work on the side when you know you can go all in.

You don’t have to start now

The idea that there is never a better time than the present isn’t always true. Life can overload you, and trying to push through it all to become a side hustle success story isn’t always worth the effort. Believe it or not, there can and will be better times to start or continue a side hustle in the future.

Taking breaks and giving yourself time to heal physically and emotionally will help you reach success when you’re ready.

Slowing down to speed back up is essential. Running a marathon isn’t all sprinting, and it would help if you had time to coast a bit to burst back to being busy and successful.

Please understand that I believe in pursuing side hustles and have experienced their benefits.

• More money to save and live a better life.

• Learning and improving on valuable skills.

• Opening up doors to new career opportunities.

You should definitely find and go for your side hustle—in time. Please make sure you’re thrilled about it inside and out.

If not, build up excitement by practicing the skills you would use in your side hustle as a hobby. Do it for fun. That’s what it should be, after all, anyway, right? When you can enjoy the process of writing, making, and creating, it gets easier to pursue it for a profit later.

Turning what you enjoy into a small business isn’t a walk in the park. When times are tough or not going the way you’d hoped, being able to do what you do for fun can keep you excited and motivated.

Even though I’ve actively sought out freelance work in the past, I’m enjoying writing on Medium and working on my unique voice at this point in my life. I’ve done some illustrations for a couple of clients this year but haven’t pushed hard for many more. It’s nice not having constant deadlines, and working when I want feels good for as long as I want.

Taking the time I needed to slow down helped me focus more on family and talking to a therapist for my mental health.

I can see myself freelancing consistently soon, but I’m in no rush. At least I’ve proven I can do it in the past, so getting back into side hustling with more gusto feels possible.

If you’re a super go-getter or afraid you won’t start, decide how long you’ll wait to begin side hustling. Give yourself a three months break.

Write down your plans to begin something in a year and mark it on your calendar. However long you think you’ll need to get back on track, have a goal of when you’ll start so you can look forward to it and mentally prepare.

The world and you have been through hell. Give yourself time and grace to build yourself up, and then hop on working your side hustle when you’re prepared.

Better times are ahead. Slow down and rest to work your side hustle at your best. You owe it to yourself, and your customers and clients will notice the difference.

Want more? If you’re struggling with doing original work, click here to join my (free) email list, and through comics, articles about culture, and living your truth, you can upgrade your mindset and share your art with the world.

3 Reasons I’m Enjoying Drawing Again

How color and variety can pull you back into your sketchbook.

All illustrations by the author.

Do you have fun practicing the art you love consistently?

Scheduling time daily to sit down and write, draw, or even paint helps you turn it into a regular habit. Doing what you love whenever you feel like it doesn’t.

Even though I know to make it into a routine first, so my mind and body expect to create every day, I don’t always follow that advice. I’m fully aware if your goal is to improve at playing the piano, you know regular blocks of time tickling the ivory is how to grow as a musician.

If you’re trying to draw more, let this article be the reminder you need to get back on the horse.

How can you get excited about getting started, though? If you’re an artist, growing your drawing skills takes work. You know, focusing on the fundamentals, like figure drawing, anatomy, and portraiture, is essential, but maybe not all that fun.

I hear you. As a cartoonist myself, drawing funny faces and cute characters was what I was all about.

Who has time for drawing a bunch of realistic faces?

I had to accept; I most certainly should make time for it if I wanted my art to grow. The dream of filling up sketchbooks with beautiful examples of my artistic explorations has always been a dream, one I never thought I’d reach.

Taking an online class for portrait drawing via Domestika helped jolt me into committing to growing through sketchbook drawing, and I’d like to share some of what I learned with you.

1. Hardback sketchbooks help you feel like an artist

You can choose all kinds of sketchbooks—large-sized ones, small enough to fit in your pocket. The ring-bound ones drive me nuts because rings on the side get in the way of my hand while drawing. Even turning the book to the side doesn’t feel right.

Everything got better when I discovered hardback, book-like sketchbooks. You can open them and lay them flat to draw across two pages or focus on one. I always feel more like a true artist when I pick it up because it looks like an actual book.

Staying on top of contributing drawings to your sketchbook is easier if you set a straightforward goal. Commit to filling every page.

Only show others what you choose or want to share, just because you feel it worked. You don’t have to take photos of your drawings or even show your work to anyone. Try and fail privately, then move to the next page.

Hardback sketchbooks are easier to collect and put on a bookshelf when you’ve completed them. They look handsome. Write a title on the spine with the year and date for your collection if you want. You can look back to see how you’ve grown over the years.

I like how you feel accomplished with a hard sketchbook instead of a soft or ringed one. You get the feeling you’re making something that will last. It’s sturdy and heavy. Like your dedication to art, it’s not easily bent or manipulated.

2. Variety spices up your pages and sparks joy

Picking a few areas to focus on improving, like facial expressions or body poses, can help you know how to begin. Saying you will fill one page up with different people you find from photos on Pinterest will help keep you motivated.

The next page in your book may revolve around drawing ten different hands or making a point to get away from humans and go outside to draw a landscape or urban setting.

It can be fun to get back to basics, then throw it all together. Maybe you decide to combine a mix of everything you’re studying on one page to see how you can compose it all within a small space.

Look honestly at your art. One thing I had to accept is drawing portraits from photos, especially of women, is difficult for me. I need to improve and overcome my fear of drawing attractive women, especially. I can make cute cartoony women just fine, but not beautiful realistic-looking women. Could I do it by using photo references?

Challenge accepted!

Having a hill to get over or a goal to strive for in your sketchbook will help motivate you just enough to start drawing and want to draw more. The joy of seeing what you’ve completed on each page will keep you excited about moving forward.

3. Adding color brings your pages to life

Why only use pencils and the occasional black pen? Drawing with colored pencils gives life to the page and catches the eye. Painting in the sketchbook with mini watercolors also helps add energy and interest.

You can use a gray brush pen for shadows and Gelly Roll pens for white highlights where needed. When I thumb through my sketchbook, I smile at the color variety and pay more attention to what I created.

Asking questions like, “Did this drawing work well?” “What can I do to draw a nose better?” The color is hard to miss, and my growth areas stand out more.

The softness of colored pencils feels nice while drawing, and it surprised me. I like to use a non-photo blue pencil first when sketching heads to rough out the head shape and eye lines, then add in features starting with the eyes and nose.

Suppose you want the easiest way to begin drawing a face. Starting with the left eye, then the nose, and over to the right eye works well. Down to the mouth or up to the eyebrows next is a good order. Try this out and find what direction works best for you.

The smoothness of colored pencil lines makes for a buttery drawing experience. Of course, the rich color will create a pleasant feeling on the page you’ll enjoy taking in as you look back on your growth.

Draw when you can, where you can

In conclusion, I want you to know I understand it can be challenging to find time to draw. Let go of needing hours to work on the pages in your sketchbook. Even fifteen minutes at a time will do fine.

Opening up your sketchbook first thing in the morning, looking at a reference photo online, and drawing one portrait, will send a feeling of satisfaction that will last all day.

You drew something. Even one thing is better than nothing.

When you have a day with more time, by all means, draw more. Don’t get hung up on how long. Focus on your accomplishment. You added to your sketchbook, and you’re one step closer to filling it up.

Your art skills are improving.

Take a small sketchbook with you in your bag or back pocket. Sketch on the train, at the park, or in a cafe, even if it’s only for five minutes. You did it.

When you set the intention to draw regularly, use a sketchbook that feels comfortable, and add color and variety, watch how your drawings explode off the page.

Then, make sure to come back and let me know how it’s going.

Happy drawing!

Want more? If you’re struggling with doing original work, click here to join my (free) email list, and through comics, articles about culture, and living your truth, you can upgrade your mindset and share your art with the world.

Why I Hated The New Batman Movie- Until I Watched It

I refused to see it at first, then changed my mind.

Illustrations by the author.

Let's make one thing crystal clear. I'm a Batman fan. Unlike most people, I actually read the comics and watch the movies and animated series. In fact, as a comic artist myself, I love drawing Batman.

The only problem? I'm kind of tired of him.

We've had way too many Batman movies, and in just the last ten years, we've had Ben Affleck and Christian Bale play the caped crusader in the films.

Moving aside from Affleck, I loved Bale as Batman in The Dark Knight, Christopher Nolan's second film in his series. Perhaps, you'll agree that it's one of the best Batman movies ever made. Pitting him against Heath Ledger's masterful take on the Joker is legendary.

As much as I love seeing Batman do his thing, I felt we should have had at least 3–5 years without new Batman films after Nolan's run. Give us a break, and build up anticipation for seeing him again.

The Justice League movies pulled Affleck out as a hefty Bruce Wayne, inspired by Frank Miller's Dark Knight, breaking bones and whispering raspy to give us a mediocre Bats performance.

Enough. I was done. Time for a Batman pause, don't you think Hollywood?

Nope. The money is just too good. They had to keep the train moving and announced a new film with Twilight actor Robert Pattinson as The Batman and directed by Matt Reeves—known for the Planet of The Apes films.

What?! Are you kidding me? Pattinson? That skinny, whiny dude? No way I'm watching that one. I guessed Hollywood figured people would spend money on a Batman movie no matter who's playing him.

Before watching The Batman

With Pattinson playing Bruce Wayne, I lost interest. It felt like anyone could play Batman nowadays. If just anyone can fit the role, why not get Channing Tatum or Finn Wolfhard—the kid from Stranger Things. As a Black man, I'd love to see Jaden Smith take on the caped crusader. Heck, let's go ahead and break the ground wide open, dig deeper.

Hint. Hollywood didn't.

So, when The Batman came out, I decided there was no way I would see it.

The trailer of him walking up to a gang with Joker painted faces and beating the crap out of them made him look like a psycho. And a bit silly. The scenes with Detective Gordon looked like they were trying too hard to look dark and gritty.

In my mind, I was okay with missing this one. Plus, the fact that it's three hours long! My issues with these saga-length movies recently were discussed thoroughly in a previous article about how they’re too damn long.

I avoided it the first month it was out. Then, my birthday came up, and I needed something fun to do for myself. As a husband and father, I rarely get out of the house for something only I want to do.

Looking up the reviews of The Batman, I discovered the critics were pretty happy with it overall. They said it was a bit too dark, with no jokes or light moments, but a pretty decent movie.

As a gift to myself, I decided to try the movie. If it sucked, I could write a review on Medium and make it an excuse to get my frustration out through the craft of writing. I am a Batman fan, after all.

After watching The Batman

I loved it. That’s right, I was hating on it before and was nervous it would be the worst three hours of my life, but surprisingly, I thoroughly enjoyed The Batman.

Yes, it was dark, sad, heavy, and they made Bruce Wayne look like a weirdo, but I like this take on him. If you think about it, a guy running around in a bat suit fighting crime is crazy.

For the first time, they addressed that he’s a billionaire orphan who thinks he has it the worst because his parents were killed. A tragedy to happen to anybody, but he can still live a privileged life. So many people have to go through worse, and it doesn’t drive them to become reclusive vigilantes.

Pitting him against The Riddler was interesting because it allowed us to see more of a detective Batman, still figuring out how the Gotham city underworld works. It’s only two years after Bruce started going out as Bats, so he keeps having to decide who he is and what to do at every turn.

The action scenes were pretty good, but I felt it looked a bit similar to The Dark Knight, but it is Batman, so there are certain things he has to do in the movies. I loved Zoe Kravitz as Catwoman, and her performance brought the whole film together for me, and the world wouldn’t have worked without her.

The cinematography was gorgeous, and it’s a movie I will buy and watch while drawing. I could put it on in the background, mute the sound, and enjoy watching the images as I write and create to keep my energy up.

I went to the restroom once during the film. But all in all, the three hours moved by quickly. They needed the time, and I’m glad they used it. When I was in high school, I dreamed of a dark Batman movie, and my young dream came true with The Batman.

Sometimes movies aren’t always what they seem

You can’t judge a movie by its trailer. At least not always. I’m pretty good at detecting a stinker from watching the previews, but this surprised me. If you’re a Batman fan and on the fence whether or not to spend the time to see it, I say go.

You can wait until it’s streaming online somewhere, and it will be worth your time. I’m glad I saw it in the theater, though, and it was more dynamic to watch the action scenes on the big screen.

I’m willing to admit I was wrong. The Batman is a good take on a character done to death. The movie showed me how you can still make characters fresh and breathe new life into them.

I’m looking forward to the sequel and where they’ll take Pattinson next.

Want more? If you’re struggling with doing original work, click here to join my (free) email list, and through comics, articles about culture, and living your truth, you can upgrade your mindset and share your art with the world.

3 Reasons You're Unsatisfied With Adulthood

And how to change your mindset to get more out of life.

Wincing at life. Illustrated by the author.

I bet you thought becoming an adult would be so much fun. You would have complete control of your life, no parents telling you what to do.

Thinking the same almost ruined me when I got out in my twenties. "Wait. You mean I have to make all the decisions now and stop blaming everything on my parents?"

Yup. It gets real, real fast.

“As a child I assumed that when I reached adulthood, I would have grown-up thoughts.”
― David Sedaris, Let’s Explore Diabetes with Owls

I get what makes it feel sucky at times as a creative professional, husband, and father through more than twenty-five years of adult life after college under my belt.

I learned it’s about more than just screaming "Life sucks!" every time events don't go your way. Paying attention to these three reasons below can help you stay confident while slaying adulting.

1. Life is complicated no matter where you are on Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs

Life is tough no matter what. How much you have or gain doesn't exclude you from the difficulties life throws at you constantly. I know you want more out of it, and for a good reason, but you forget, or perhaps aren't appreciating, everyone isn't in the same place as you.

Even if they were, it wouldn't matter anyway. Hard to hear, perhaps, but taking an honest look at where we are right now can help give you perspective.

Understanding where you are on the hierarchy of needs pyramid can help you know where you're going and give you faith things can improve.

Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs poster courtesy of playvolutionhq.com.

Let's say you reached the top. Self-actualization is all yours now. All your financial needs are taken care of; you have time to create, have meaningful relationships, and control your daily schedule. Does this mean nothing negative will ever happen to you?

When life is going insanely well, we tend to despise setbacks when they happen, almost as if we've earned the right not to have to deal with them. It's almost as if only the good things should be in our lives because we have it so good.

Consequently, if we're towards the bottom of the pyramid and our basic needs aren't being met, we want to climb up and believe getting more will solve all our problems. Life will be easier when you're at the top but not devoid of tough times.

You'll be in a more balanced place to deal with the poop as it flies at you, but no amount of security, money, or love can stop the truth of life.

Bad things happen to good people. So, accept it, take full responsibility when it all goes sideways and take care of what's necessary to get your life back on track.

The excellent news, hard times can and will get better, even if it doesn't feel that way today.

2. You think successful people are 100% happy

Striving to become a better person is good, and only working your a$$ off to buy a bigger house is not.

Scrolling social media makes you jealous of others and their perceived joyful and prosperous life, and it's never as great as it looks. Still, you want to do more, have more, and be more because you see it's possible.

The people you admire as successful do not have a perfect life, and an ideal life doesn't exist. With all the money and power, the CEO you gawk at could be having marital problems at home or health issues they're hiding from the public.

We're all battling something.

Admiring the success of others is inspiring and can fill you with joy. Put keep your mind in the reality zone. Adulthood should be about striving for the personal success important to you while understanding life can never be perfect.

Are you able to think through everything you have at this moment, good and bad, and still smile? What gives you pleasure, even though the pain?

Everything you work hard for should feel worth the stress and strain. When times are hard for me, I love drawing as an outlet. Opening up a sketchbook and trying my hand at a portrait or a funny animated character helps me smile again.

When you take stock in your achievements and where you still want to go, appreciating what you've already accomplished goes a long way. Gratitude is the key to joy, even if it's only because you understand how important life's basics are.

If you're healthy and able to go for what gets your excitement rising each morning, you have a lot to be thankful for—let that empower you.

“You’ll never see a happy ungrateful person.”

Zig Ziglar

3. You compare yourself to the wrong people.

We're all sold the idea, in America at least, that making it equals big paychecks, lots of sex, and a mansion the size of an art museum. You're not genuinely making it if you're missing these symbols of success.

Not valid for everyone, and it doesn't have to be what you desire either.

Why are you doing all of this? Is it a part of your life purpose, or because you saw someone else doing it and decided it would be cool?

Make specific, thoughtful choices. I decided a long time ago going after vast sums of money wasn't going to be my goal. Life taught me money makes things easier.

I had to understand it's OK to want to make a good salary to take care of basic needs and save for retirement; it took years to accept I enjoy travel and need enough for at least one adventure a year.

Maybe that's not necessary for everyone, but travel matters to me. Seeing the world helps me feel wealthy, and I love learning about other cultures and cities.

What do you need to benefit you, your family, and your overall mental health right now? Write down a list of your needs and wants. Getting serious about what matters to you as an individual, not what you think you "should" desire is a good goal.

Are you in a place mentally to work towards being a self-actualized human being? If you don't know where to go, you can't stay on the right road.

Once you have a list of what you truly want, you can find people who have done what you strive for and learn from their experiences. Read about them, or better yet, talk to them in person if you can.

You will reach your goals if you compare yourself to the right people. The people doing precisely what you aspire to do in your life.

“Don’t you find it odd,” she continued, “that when you’re a kid, everyone, all the world, encourages you to follow your dreams. But when you’re older, somehow they act offended if you even try.”
― Ethan Hawke, The Hottest State

Figure out a way to pursue your dreams

You have roadblocks to your goals. But if you get creative and find a way to go after your dreams, your life will feel loads more fulfilling and enjoyable.

No one said a good life would be easy.

Even doing what you love part-time, or dare I say, as a hobby, can create balance and instant smiles each morning you wake.

Take full responsibility for your life and do what it takes to do what you love. Yes, it may be more challenging if you're a person of color, or suffering an illness, but there are always ways to make things work.

• Take time to plan how to save enough money to give you the freedom to do more of your passions.

• Ask for help from people who can assist you on your journey or give you advice. Or, even better—mentoring.

• Work a job that doesn't take all of your brainpower, and do your passion during your off hours until you can do it full-time.

• Spend more time in groups with people who enjoy what you love. Life is less crappy when you spend it with others.

Permit yourself to love life by structuring it in a way that benefits your interests.

Keep your head in the right place. Not wanting too much all the time and giving thanks for what you have can change your outlook.

“I’ve been very blessed in my personal life and in my career and I have never been ungrateful for what I have.”

Mandy Patinkin

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Want more? If you’re struggling with doing original work, click here to join my (free) email list, and through comics, articles about culture, and living your truth, you can upgrade your mindset and share your art with the world.

Add More Procrastination to Your Writing Process

How going with the flow can sometimes make things easier.

The author in the middle of the writing process.

Writers know what they want to say and write down their thoughts quickly. Right?

Wrong!

Tonight, I sat down to write a new article with a loose outline and no idea of an exciting story to use as my lead-in.

I procrastinated and read a bunch of articles on Medium, checked social media, and then fell asleep in my recliner.

You read that right. I fell asleep.

Napping with the laptop right on my lap.

Twenty minutes later, I woke up, wiped the drool off my mouth, and read through my outline draft.

An idea finally came to me, so I went with it, researched, and continued writing for another hour.

Not very disciplined, but it was good enough to get the job done this time.

Productivity and being a “good writer” can look different for everyone.

The process isn’t always smooth and can look messy and even lazy. If it works, though, it works.

Relax and do it your way.

Want more? If you’re struggling with doing original work, click here to join my (free) email list, and through comics, articles about culture, and living your truth, you can upgrade your mindset and share your art with the world.

How Many Weeks of Life Do You Get?

And how to make them last longer.

Photo by Tyler Nix on Unsplash

How many weeks does the average person live? Maybe your first thought is way up there, like 150k weeks, 70k weeks for sure. Believe it or not, it's much less than you'd think.

Oliver Burkeman asked this question to a host of people for his book Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals, and they had similar guesses. One person even said 300k weeks.

In reality, Burkeman discovered that if you can make it to eighty years old, you guessed it, you live only around four thousand weeks.

I love how his book explores some of the deeper issues surrounding our relationship with time. The mistakes we make in trying to control it and how expectations we place on ourselves might be just plain wrong.

When you're looking to slow life down, get things done, and make the most of it, I took advice from the book that could help you.

A constant focus on productivity is useless

I love productivity hacks and practicing new ways to get more done in a day, but how much is enough? Burkeman's book argues we should ease off trying to be a productive superhero and be in the here and now instead of living for our future.

Doing more by checking things off your list is more about clearing time for more space at a later date. When I get it all done, I think I can relax and read or watch a movie without guilt because I know I took care of business.

You will enjoy your "downtime" even more if you free up your time. At least, that's the plan.

The problem with that idea, which most of us are buying, is that our "To Do" list will get completed, and it never does, and there will always be piles of stuff to do and work to get done.

Do you know when it all stops? That's right—when you're dead.

Making sure to take care of essential responsibilities is what any reasonable person should do. When we attach how much we can do directly to our self-worth, it becomes a problem.

If you only have four thousand weeks of life, will you spend it all trying to get everything done? You can't, and you never will do it all.

We spend most of our time doing things now to set everything up for a later date rather than living for the present moment.

“The problem with trying to make time for everything that feels important — or just for enough of what feels important — is that you definitely never will. The reason isn’t that you haven’t yet discovered the right time management tricks or supplied sufficient effort, or that you need to start getting up earlier, or that you’re generally useless. It’s that the underlying assumption is unwarranted: there’s no reason to believe you’ll ever feel ‘on top of things,’ or make time for everything that matters, simply by getting more done.”
― Oliver Burkeman, Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals

Embrace the joy of missing out

If you're living a life where there's so much, you have to do for work, family, and recreation time, life is pretty damn good already. You have so many opportunities to live life to the fullest; you don't have time to experience them all.

Four Thousand Weeks helped me understand there can never be a time where we have it all—especially not all at once.

Instead of fearing missing out, embrace what Burkeman calls the joy of missing out.

Knowing you have so much you could do but can't should fill you with glee. What a rich life you live. You have to pick and choose. There’s so much to enjoy, work for, or experience.

Feeling like we can't do it all should help us feel grateful for the good life we're leading and, in turn, live more in the moment.

“Convenience culture seduces us into imagining that we might find room for everything important by eliminating only life’s tedious tasks. But it’s a lie. You have to choose a few things, sacrifice everything else, and deal with the inevitable sense of loss that results.”
― Oliver Burkeman, Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals

The universe could care less what you do

Here's some hard truth to swallow. You're constantly busy working like a dog to make your mark on the world, not realizing the universe doesn't care.

Maybe in the future, your friends and family will, but in the long run, you're not going to become a legend, remembered two hundred years from now for your astounding achievements and remarkable ability to keep it all together.

Perhaps it's morbid to think we're all going to die and the world will forget us, but hopefully, it can help you calm down about doing big things while alive.

If you're lucky, your family will remember you forever. Your legacy of kindness, support, and meaningful work ethic can most certainly endure. How many items you were able to check off your list every day will not.

The universe wants you to create your life and experience it in any way that might look for you.

That's it.

Should you kill yourself working for a professional legacy when you could spend more time enjoying what you've created right now?

“Cosmic insignificance therapy is an invitation to face the truth about your irrelevance in the grand scheme of things. To embrace it, to whatever extent you can. (Isn’t it hilarious, in hindsight, that you ever imagined things might be otherwise?) Truly doing justice to the astonishing gift of a few thousand weeks isn’t a matter of resolving to “do something remarkable” with them. In fact, it entails precisely the opposite: refusing to hold them to an abstract and overdemanding standard of remarkableness.”
― Oliver Burkeman, Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals

Patience gives you power

Learning you have four thousand weeks to live may make you fear the passage of time and want to slow it all down. I'm impatient with a lot of what I want out of life, but I'm starting to see how some of the best stuff takes time to develop.

When you revel in the experience of building, practicing, and learning what you need to get where you want to go, it feels magical. Pay more attention, and time will slow down. It's like having patience with the process and appreciating everything like it's brand new.

As we age, life seems to travel by at lightning speed. Making sure to pause, meditate, smile, and give thanks when great or even not-so-great experiences occur, can help you feel life is rich and full.

And best of all, moving slower.

When you live for the now, your weeks will be longer and your life more fulfilling.

"Mortality makes it impossible to ignore the absurdity of living solely for the future."
― Oliver Burkeman, Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals

How to get things done in your four thousand weeks

Life demands we take action no matter how much we may want to spend time relaxing and enjoying the moment. Now you know, though, there's no way to get every important item done, but you can prioritize.

Burkeman gives some ways to make the tough choices of what to focus on easier so you can get on to appreciating life more.

• Determine time boundaries for work you'll get done each day. This could be as simple as deciding how much time to spend working on a given day. Let's say you start at 8 am and choose to work until 6 pm. Within those hours are when all aspects of your work are done. When time is up, you have to stop and have leisure time. I like to schedule morning work hours from 5 am to 10 am for writing and drawing, even on the weekends. After that, I'm with my family and having fun the rest of the day.

• Focus on one large project at a time. You might think it's better to tackle all your significant projects a little, so you're gradually making progress on each, but Burkeman disagrees. If you can get used to dealing with the anxiety of not getting other projects done and working solely on one at a time, you'll do better work and have more confidence giving your all to what's most important right now.

• Use "strategic underachievement" and decide what to fail at in advance. You feel hurt when you try hard and fail at something, but you can't succeed at everything. So, decide to be okay because there will be some tasks you either can't do well right now or won't do because there's no time. Parenting takes the front seat when my daughter needs more help with homework, and I don't have the time to write for as long. I can decide to suck at being a writer for a week until she's in a better place with her projects, knowing I can get back on the keyboard soon.

• Practice doing nothing. Life keeps moving, and we feel like all we can do is roll with it. You can choose to stop and just be. People have a super hard time with this and need to pick up their phones in any open moment to scroll social media apps mindlessly. Stop, sit, and just breathe. Taking time to be mindful of yourself or meditate helps to put everything in the proper perspective and cool your jets.

Living a fulfilling four thousand weeks involves getting less done while being mindful and appreciative of what you get to do.

You don't need to do as much as you think, and training yourself to be proud of how much you can get done can upgrade your days. The classic idea of quality over quantity is what successful weeks of life are all about—time to decide what matters most to you and start living fully with the time you have.

Want more? If you’re struggling with doing original work, click here to join my (free) email list, and through comics, articles about culture, and living your truth, you can upgrade your mindset and share your art with the world.

Movies Are Too Damn Long

Why not simplify and tell better stories, Hollywood?

Photo by tommao wang on Unsplash

Going to the movies feels like work now.

You have to sit through twenty minutes of previews; then, you already feel like it’s time to use the restroom when the movie actually starts.

Are you with me in wishing Hollywood would get better at telling more succinct stories? Let’s keep them at under two hours, please.

Whatever happened to an hour and a half? The amount of time to pull you in, present the characters and problem, take you through the climax and finish with a nice tying up of loose ends. Ah! That used to feel good.

Not anymore. Hollywood wants us to go back into movie theaters but gives us films longer than our commutes to work and back. Who wants to spend three hours in a big room with other germy humans, talking and checking their phones, when you could be at home?

Not only your comfort zone, but home is where you have all the power to pause, rewind, or shut off the movie you’re streaming whenever needed.

You’re not trapped in a box with a bunch of strangers.

Movies don’t have to be so long

You know it’s possible to cut out the majority of that three-hour movie you just watched, but the directors didn’t. In fact, they probably cut hours of footage to keep it under four.

I love how much we can do with special effects and how Hollywood is better at making quality movies now than thirty years ago, but I believe people are tired. Yes, from the pandemic and world affairs, but emotionally exhausted as well. Can we have a short escape that doesn’t vacuum our free time?

That’s probably why more people are watching YouTube videos. Give me a fifteen-minute piece of entertainment, where I can choose whether or not to watch another afterward, is golden. Having the power to decide how to use your entertainment time is compelling.

Believe it or not, I love going to the movies. Watching on the big screen and only having one thing to focus on for a couple of hours is magical. I can follow the story more leisurely and appreciate the hard work and creativity the cast and crew put into it.

If you’re making a marathon-length film, you have to expect some people to miss parts of the story. Either you’re leaving to use the restroom or zoning out while watching, thinking about when to get up and go to the bathroom.

Am I obsessed with having the freedom to relieve myself during a movie? Yes. There should be no shame in using the bathroom, but extremely long movies make you scared you’re going to miss something important. If you stay seated and push through, you’re uncomfortable and not enjoying it the way you should.

Bring back the intermission

Let’s treat going to the movies like watching a play. Please give us an intermission. You know you need a break between all the action and plot points to use the restroom and stretch your legs.

We take way too long for the entire story arc to play out nowadays, and viewers are left twiddling their thumbs while thinking about when to get up to go pee.

You have to sit longer than ever now because most Marvel movies, for example, have post-credit scenes. You have 20–30 minutes of sitting to watch a 30-second teaser that connects to the next film.

I love that this gives people a chance to read the credits and understand how many people it takes to make that special effects blockbuster you just watched, but it’s a considerable time investment we shouldn’t feel sad about missing.

If you know there’ll be an intermission, deciding to go to a movie theater will be more manageable and less stressful.

Give us our time back

We have enough devices and screens vying for our time and attention these days. While watching a movie in the theaters, you may stay focused on one thing, but so much of your day is sucked away by how long they are. For some people, I can see why they would opt out.

With our busy lives, it’s tough to devote half your day to go to the movies. There’s so much you’re missing or could be doing.

When you shorten movies and give more bang in less time, people feel like their time was well spent. I didn’t even bring up the giant elephant in the room—what if the movie sucks?

You’re spending hours of your life watching something terrible. Walking out of the theater in shock at how poorly you spent your time and how badly Hollywood just wasted it.

I’m looking for better, shorter, and more creative ways to tell stories, so we don’t have to devote our entire lives to our favorite movies or franchises. One upside to a shorter film is wanting more when the credits roll.

Remember that feeling?

We sure don’t have much of that anymore. When a movie is done playing through nowadays, we breathe a sigh of relief. “Phew! We made it through!”

The only exception is animated movies. Am I the only one going into one with less weight on my shoulders, knowing it will be a fun experience and over relatively quickly?

I’m sure animation studios would make three-hour movies if it didn’t take a bajillion years to make one. Sometimes the constraints of the creative arts can be a good thing.

Movies are too damn long, and making them last longer does not equal higher quality. From now on, I’m giving more props to the ones that can put it all together beautifully in under two hours.

Let’s see if Hollywood is up to the challenge.

Want more? If you’re struggling with doing original work, click here to join my (free) email list, and through comics, articles about culture, and living your truth, you can upgrade your mindset and share your art with the world.

Finding Your Purpose is Simpler Than You Think

Here’s one undeniable way to discover yours.

Photo by Jaunt and Joy on Unsplash

You’re looking to find purpose—a reason to get up in the morning or a career to fulfill your heart and soul. I know the feeling.

You try this and try that for a little while, only to be disappointed you don’t fall in love right away. “When will my calling hit me in the face and change my life for the better?” you wonder.

Come on; you can’t be serious. No Fairy Godmother of Purpose will ever appear and grant you a life of passion and meaning. Even if someone offers you a fantastic opportunity, you have to recognize it first.

A purpose can sometimes come from natural abilities or a need you feel you must fulfill from early in your life, but it’s rare. You won’t like reading this—but a purpose takes hard work and patience.

It’s not a magical gift from the gods.

Coming from writing and creating comics regularly for many years, I now know my purpose is to educate and entertain through stories and art. I didn’t hike up a mountain to the top and receive a divine message.

I discovered my purpose by doing the work.

But don’t worry, it’s not as hard as you might think. You have to make concrete decisions and stick to them. Here’s how…

Commit to something

Discovering your purpose first takes you to committing to learning and growing in a particular area or career. It’s astonishing how connected we can become to an area we choose to give ourselves to heart and soul.

What are you interested in learning and becoming the best at over many years? If you pick something that excites you and scares you a little, you’re on the right track.

Make a point to practice the skill regularly to improve, and you’ll see how it fills you with purpose, with a drive to do better and share it with the world. When you commit—essentially, take responsibility for something—it gives your life meaning.

Pretty simple, right?

I’ve loved writing for most of my life, but committing to posting articles here on Medium regularly and becoming a better writer helped cultivate my feeling of purpose. Helping inspire others to succeed now feels like my purpose through the written word.

“The quality of a person’s life is in direct proportion to their commitment to excellence, regardless of their chosen field of endeavor.”

Vince Lombardi

Embrace responsibility

People run away from responsibility like it’s an evil villain chasing them in a horror movie, preferring to escape into simple, non-threatening pleasure-seeking getaways as much as possible.

If you want a purpose-driven life, you have to embrace the responsibility that goes along with that life. You can’t have one thing without the other. Accepting that there’s a price to pay for everything is a part of doing something worthwhile.

If you want to be a better writer, you’ll need to watch less TV and spend more hours on the keyboard. The more you work at it, the better you’re writing will become, then you begin to desire watching TV less as your desire to write grows. You feel like it’s your purpose.

When you, let’s say, become a parent, volunteer somewhere, commit to a relationship, take on a mortgage to buy a home or any one of a thousand other “responsibilities,” they permeate your life with purpose and meaning.

That’s the upside of responsibility no one tells you.

“Without commitment you cannot have depth in anything.”

Neil Strauss

Attract your purpose through action

It’s all on you now. Commit to growing and improving in several parts of your life that interest you.

Even if you don’t think it could be your purpose right now, you’d be amazed by how things look different once you dedicate yourself to them and become the best over time.

When I started teaching art in an elementary school, I thought I would hate it because I wasn’t making all of my money being an illustrator. There were a lot of new responsibilities to take on, like taking care of children and classroom management, and I had to learn to plan lessons and make a curriculum.

Over that first year of teaching, I was pleasantly surprised at how much I enjoyed being an educator. I made time to draw comics in my off-hours, and I felt like my teaching job was making a difference to young people.

The position grew on me as I took on the commitment and handled the responsibility. You won’t always know what will be the right fit.

When you commit and work hard, your purpose finds you.

Want more? If you’re struggling with making authentic work, click here to join my (free) email list, and through comics, articles about culture, and living your truth, you can discover how to upgrade your mindset and share your creative writing and art with the world.

5 Truths The “Queer Eye” Hosts Can Help You Discover About Living Authentically

And how to put them into practice.

Photo courtesy of Wikimedia Commons.

Discovering what you need to improve your life and then taking steps to actually do it are two different things entirely.

No one would argue values like practicing self-love, having confidence, and pride in yourself are essential for a fulfilling life.

So, why can’t most of us figure out how to be that person?

The power of the Netflix streaming show “Queer Eye” is how it jolts regular everyday people back into who they know they are and helps them discover how to be fully present in the world. I’m all for those ideals, but I’ll admit—and don’t hate me here—at first, I wasn’t sure if the show could be for me.

After all, I’m a straight Black male who’s not even into fashion. Isn’t that the main reason to watch the show—for the seemingly magical makeovers?

We wanted something uplifting to watch as a family and their season visiting Japan pulled us in, like a top-rated sushi restaurant on Saturday evening. I kept looking over my shoulder, afraid someone imaginary might catch me watching and laugh, but as the first episode progressed, I began falling in love.

I was pleasantly surprised by the life-changing emotional makeovers. The hosts take everything deeper by getting to know the person they’re helping and showing how much they care. It’s more than just about your outward appearance.

You get to recognize some of what we all are facing internally and watch the guests heal or move forward through heaps of fear and pain.

The “Fab Five” cast members each take on a different part of the transformation. They show us the secrets to living our truth. Here’s what you can learn from them and how to put them into action.

1. You’re not alone in suffering

“Queer Eye” gives us Karamo Brown, a Black psychotherapist and TV host who steps in to help you remember all the beautiful parts of life you forgot or are turning your back on regularly.

Karamo sits down and has quiet and heartfelt conversations with the person nominated by a family member or friend for the show and works out with them how to overcome their sadness, laziness, and lack of motivation they’re going through.

Seeing a Black man comfortably and calmly talking about feelings with each person is delightfully refreshing. The fact that he’s in a private setting and not in front of a studio audience helps it feel authentic like he genuinely cares about helping them grow.

I’ve done therapy in the past, but this show reminds me of the lightbulb moments you can have when talking to someone trained to hear and help with your issues. You know you don’t have to carry everything alone.

Takeaway: Help is out there, and with it, you can learn to let go of what’s holding you back. Make a point to find a therapist or talk with someone close to you openly on a regular basis.

2. Your personal space at home matters

If you live in a sh*thole, you’re going to feel like sh*t.

Bobby Berks understands what it means to have a space that lifts your spirits. He’s an interior designer with a heart of solid gold and willing to re-organize your room to make you feel safe and creative again.

His job is to re-arrange your place, so you get the chance to improve your interpersonal relationships, and feel rich and relaxed at the same time. Of course, when you have guests over, they feel your personality radiate out from your colorful decor, creating an atmosphere of joy.

Takeaway: Make time to clean up your home to give space for everything to breathe. Find ways to add color and cute small touches to your home like photos, throw pillows, and rugs. If you can afford to hire an interior designer—do it. They can take what they learn about you to create spaces that make you feel healthier and happier when you’re at home.

3. Clothes help make you look and feel fabulous

Tan France is an English fashion designer of South Asian descent, he is here to give you tips on what clothes you should wear and the ones you should avoid. His mastery of discovering what cuts and colors work well for your body type is phenomenal.

I’m not a big clothes shopper, and not good at noticing what works well on me. So, watching Tan help people looks like magic. My sister has helped me find and take chances on new styles in the past, and I’ve always appreciated her help and eye for fashion.

Seeing the closet of new clothes, picked exclusively for the person in that particular episode of the show, always gets me jealous. I want a designer to help me learn how to dress to impress.

Takeaway: Take more risks on new clothes. You might not have a designer with you to go shopping, but take a friend or family member who can pick out something they think could work. Sometimes you just need someone else to encourage you.

4. Cooking and eating well is a magical gift of life

The kitchen is the center of a home where we not only learn to cook, but how to socialize and work together as a family and as human beings.

Antoni Porowski, a Canadian food expert and TV personality, gets into your kitchen to get rid of unhealthy food and teaches how to cook and connect with yourself. His recipes create a healthier lifestyle and, for some, a deeper connection to their family members.

Food not only fills your belly, but helps you understand your culture while you create something delicious by hand. Cooking and eating together is the way humans have been cooperating since the beginning of time. Learning to cook makes you a part of history—your family’s and the world’s.

Takeaway: Learn to cook. Start with one dish you can make for dinner. Improve on it and have it as your go-to dish when needed. You can make it for yourself, as a way to help your family, or to impress a new friend. The pride you’ll feel for being able to cook a delicious meal will boost your zest for life.

5. Your hairstyle reflects your personality

I shave all of my hair off and enjoy going completely bald, so I’m not sure what that says about me as a person.

Back when I had hair, I remember trying different afro styles to see how it made me look and feel. Hairstyles have personality and can change your appearance.

It’s important to take them seriously.

My personal favorite of the five, Jonathan van Ness, is a hairdresser bursting with personality who focuses on your image by giving you haircuts that matches your personality and facial structure. They excel at pampering your skin and your confidence, so you glow for yourself and to others.

I’m always surprised with how guests on the show believe they don’t need to update their hair or makeup and want to stick to what works. Or, what’s comfortable. Watching Jonathan break them out of their shell and become almost like new, even uplifts the way they carry themselves.

Takeaway: Have the courage to talk with a hairdresser or barber about a style that will flatter how you look and feel right now in your life. Be open to suggestions and making changes and then see how it improves your whole being.

Get help from people who care

When you watch “Queer Eye” you discover it’s not just a reality makeover; it’s a game-changing show.

It offers guidance, confidence, acceptance, tolerance, and help getting out of your comfort zone. You wake up to finally having the life you always wanted.

Some of you out here will be able to watch and immediately make changes you know will improve your quality of life. Most of us, will need some help.

One of the biggest truths of the show is if we want to make real change in our life, we need help from people who care. Find, hire, or ask for help and most importantly, stay open to growing as a person.

You have the power to become a game-changer for your own life right now.

Want more? If you’re struggling with making authentic work, click here to join my (free) email list, and through comics, articles about culture, and living your truth, you can discover how to upgrade your mindset and share your creative writing and art with the world.

Three Scientific Reasons to Smile More Every Day

What does a smile really mean in the grand scheme of things?

Photo by Vince Fleming on Unsplash

Imagine you’re walking by a person on the street. They look you in the eyes and give you a big smile. I bet you feel better already. The energy of that smile travels over and makes you smile back. 

It’s infectious, and I bet it’s what you need right now.

But, why?

Yes, life is challenging all over the world in these uncertain times. Everyone is battling something and could use a little pick-me-up in the energy department, but there’s more to it than that. 

You need to know that a smile is possible right now. It’s a sign of hope. 

When you see someone else filled with joy, you know it’s possible for you too. Even if you don’t have anything on your mind to smile about, the act is simple. 

Smiling is something you can do for yourself anytime, even if you’re not feeling happy at the moment, and it leads you down the road to more positive energy. Even if your life is full of things you can’t do, you know you can, as the saying goes, turn that frown upside down. 

Smiling takes effort, though. Why should you bother? Isn’t it better to walk around with a mean mug, so others know you’re about business? 

Here are three reasons you should make a point to smile more each day.

A smile lifts you when you’re feeling down

When you’ve been upset about something, how often do you think about cracking a smile? Not much, I’m pretty sure, but making a point to smile can help quickly pull you out of your funk.

Scientific studies suggest a smile can trick your brain into thinking you’re happy. Your body will produce endorphins, a natural painkiller, to alleviate your sadness.

Researchers at the University of Tennessee, Knoxville, and Texas A&M, wrote a paper looking at 50 years of data testing whether facial expressions can lead people to feel emotions connected to those expressions.

Nicholas Coles, a UT Ph.D. student in social psychology and lead researcher on the paper, found these results:

Using a statistical technique called meta-analysis, Coles and his team combined data from 138 studies testing more than 11,000 participants from all around the world. According to the results of the meta-analysis, facial expressions have a small impact on feelings. For example, smiling makes people feel happier, scowling makes them feel angrier, and frowning makes them feel sadder.

Making a point to smile more, especially in difficult times, could be just what you need.

A smile helps ease your anxiety 

Feeling anxious is pretty much standard these days. There’s so much to worry about. It’s no wonder people are doing all they can to escape their emotions, like drinking liquor and taking anti-anxiety drugs. Why not try a simple smile?

Smiling helps to relieve stress and calm anxiety.  

It might sound silly, but if you treat smiling like exercise for your mouth muscles, I bet you’d remember to do it more. It feels like it takes more effort than a frown when I smile for no reason, and my mouth needs me to keep it turned up, or it falls back into that flat neutral zone.

The more you smile, the stronger and easier it gets to do the action, and the better you’ll feel. Associating what makes you anxious as a negative is most likely part of the cause of your fears. If we smile while thinking about what’s giving us anxiety, it can become more of a favorable opportunity in our minds.

It is similar to an area of growth or chance to prove you have what it takes to succeed in life or your day-to-day work. 

A smile can help you live a longer life

The secret to a long life has a smile a day included in its ingredients. Yes, there are plenty of angry older people, but for the most part, growing old takes looking at life with the proper perspective. You have to see the positive and smile in response to help your attitude remain light and keep a youthful mind.

There’s something about using your facial muscles to smile that turns up the number of years you live. 

A research project at Wayne State University was done in 2010, tracking the longevity of baseball players who smiled in their baseball cards. This study found that the span of a player’s smile could predict their life span. 

Players who didn’t smile in their pictures lived an average of only 72.9 years, while players with beaming smiles lived an average of 79.9 years. Not a huge difference, I know, but my guess is the smiling players had a better quality of life and isn’t that what really matters?

How you feel about yourself and the life you’re creating is an essential part of waking up and facing your days. 

Keep smiling to uplift your life

Make a decision right now to remember to smile. I’m not talking about just every time you see someone, more about when you’re alone, even when you’re on your laptop getting work done. Remember to smile. Are you driving to work?

Smile.

You know it feels magnificent, but how come you don’t make a point to smile more throughout the day? Yeah, maybe smiling when you’re alone looks ridiculous, but who cares. A smile is a reward for all the stress and strife you’re facing in uncertain times. Give yourself that gift and get over how it may look to others. 

Remind yourself to smile, almost like you remember to stretch or workout. You’ll feel better, and when you pass someone else and help them lighten up, they’ll probably end up smiling too. 

Spreading joy has never been more effortless.

Want more? If you’re struggling with making authentic work, click here to join my (free) email list, and through comics, articles about culture, and living your truth, you can discover how to upgrade your mindset and share your creative writing and art with the world.

Why You Need to Build Calluses on Your Brain to Succeed in Life

How one quote by David Goggins could help you embrace suffering

Photo courtesy of intellectualsinsider.com.

One of the most brutal truths to accept: suffering is something everyone experiences in life, and you are not immune. But you can get stronger.

Feeling disappointment when bad things happen is usual, and it can almost feel like, however, you're a victim of bad karma. Like all of this shouldn't be happening to you.

Let's get real here, going through hard times, heartbreak, and unforeseen challenges will occur regularly and most likely break your spirit. Staying strong through it all takes strength and confidence, but most of all, determination.

How can you not let the crap of life drag you down the drain with it?

Look at suffering as an edge

Whenever I hear David Goggins speak or read his stern but encouraging words, it puts everything in the proper perspective. Tough to take in at times, but core strengthening.

David Goggins is an ultramarathon runner, ultra-distance cyclist, triathlete, motivational speaker, and author if you don't know him. He's a retired United States Navy SEAL and former United States Air Force Tactical Air Control Party member who served in Afghanistan and the Iraq War.

Goggins is a former world record holder for the most pull-ups done in 24 hours (4,030 to be exact). Crazy, right?! His self-help memoir, Can't Hurt Me, was released in 2018 and is chock full of inspirational quotes to help you take action and live the life of a warrior.

Becoming just like him is not the goal—there's no way I could even come close—but becoming stronger to face whatever life throws at you is definitely where you should want to grow.

Here's his way to think about this:

“You have to build calluses on your brain just like how you build calluses on your hands. Callus your mind through pain and suffering.” David Goggins

When you're familiar with suffering and confident you can move forward, you have an edge in life even while in pain.

Hardening your resolve when challenges face you, and they will, gives you the confidence to say, "I've been through worse; I can take this." You aren't as phased by pain and setbacks the way others are.

If you go through hell, you don't expect to live in heaven at all times.

Seek challenges to learn how to face hard times

In what I've read from David Goggins, he believes you have to suffer from growing, and there's no way around it. This idea resonated with me, but I wouldn't say I liked the feeling it gave at first.

You know intellectually you will not succeed at everything, but you hope never to experience disappointment or failure. It doesn't add up. I had to accept that the good of life comes with the bad—even though I wanted to feel like it should be easy and fun.

Goggins says you should train yourself to get stronger by seeking out challenging goals and pushing hard towards achieving them. You'll go through pain, but come out with those calluses to keep you moving forward.

They say life is a marathon and not a sprint, and well, I think it's more of an Iron Man Triathlon. It would be best to excel in many different areas, from managing your emotions to developing and growing employable skills while keeping a positive outlook on life.

It's not simple, but you can succeed at just about anything when you understand you have the power already inside you.

Start running into your fear zone today

You will become great if you can get through doing all the crap you hate to do. This idea is one Goggins believes, and I've seen work in my life.

Living through health problems and job losses was difficult, but I have to admit that facing rejection regularly is one of the toughest.

As a creative person, rejection is something you must become acquainted with, almost like it's a family member you tolerate. Submitting articles to publications and hearing it's not fit for them, or putting a piece of art out there no one responds to, or even worse gives negative comments about, is a nightmare.

You can't make the possibility of rejection stop you from sharing your work or who you truly are. I like to call my feeling of uncertainty a "Fear Zone." When I notice my reluctance to submit or put something out in the world I worked hard on, I tell myself to run, not walk, into that fear zone.

When something doesn't go how you planned, or someone tells you no, it feels crappy. Sure, you can feel upset and even get mad and depressed, but you must rise again at some point.

When you've built up the mental muscles to handle your disappointments, do the uncomfortable work, and still walk through fear, you may fail many times, but at some point, you will succeed.

Take a tip from David Goggins and start building those mental calluses today.

Want more? If you’re struggling with making authentic work, click here to join my (free) email list, and through comics, articles about culture, and living your truth, you can discover how to upgrade your mindset and share your creative writing and art with the world.