3 Reasons You're Unsatisfied With Adulthood

And how to change your mindset to get more out of life.

Wincing at life. Illustrated by the author.

I bet you thought becoming an adult would be so much fun. You would have complete control of your life, no parents telling you what to do.

Thinking the same almost ruined me when I got out in my twenties. "Wait. You mean I have to make all the decisions now and stop blaming everything on my parents?"

Yup. It gets real, real fast.

“As a child I assumed that when I reached adulthood, I would have grown-up thoughts.”
― David Sedaris, Let’s Explore Diabetes with Owls

I get what makes it feel sucky at times as a creative professional, husband, and father through more than twenty-five years of adult life after college under my belt.

I learned it’s about more than just screaming "Life sucks!" every time events don't go your way. Paying attention to these three reasons below can help you stay confident while slaying adulting.

1. Life is complicated no matter where you are on Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs

Life is tough no matter what. How much you have or gain doesn't exclude you from the difficulties life throws at you constantly. I know you want more out of it, and for a good reason, but you forget, or perhaps aren't appreciating, everyone isn't in the same place as you.

Even if they were, it wouldn't matter anyway. Hard to hear, perhaps, but taking an honest look at where we are right now can help give you perspective.

Understanding where you are on the hierarchy of needs pyramid can help you know where you're going and give you faith things can improve.

Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs poster courtesy of playvolutionhq.com.

Let's say you reached the top. Self-actualization is all yours now. All your financial needs are taken care of; you have time to create, have meaningful relationships, and control your daily schedule. Does this mean nothing negative will ever happen to you?

When life is going insanely well, we tend to despise setbacks when they happen, almost as if we've earned the right not to have to deal with them. It's almost as if only the good things should be in our lives because we have it so good.

Consequently, if we're towards the bottom of the pyramid and our basic needs aren't being met, we want to climb up and believe getting more will solve all our problems. Life will be easier when you're at the top but not devoid of tough times.

You'll be in a more balanced place to deal with the poop as it flies at you, but no amount of security, money, or love can stop the truth of life.

Bad things happen to good people. So, accept it, take full responsibility when it all goes sideways and take care of what's necessary to get your life back on track.

The excellent news, hard times can and will get better, even if it doesn't feel that way today.

2. You think successful people are 100% happy

Striving to become a better person is good, and only working your a$$ off to buy a bigger house is not.

Scrolling social media makes you jealous of others and their perceived joyful and prosperous life, and it's never as great as it looks. Still, you want to do more, have more, and be more because you see it's possible.

The people you admire as successful do not have a perfect life, and an ideal life doesn't exist. With all the money and power, the CEO you gawk at could be having marital problems at home or health issues they're hiding from the public.

We're all battling something.

Admiring the success of others is inspiring and can fill you with joy. Put keep your mind in the reality zone. Adulthood should be about striving for the personal success important to you while understanding life can never be perfect.

Are you able to think through everything you have at this moment, good and bad, and still smile? What gives you pleasure, even though the pain?

Everything you work hard for should feel worth the stress and strain. When times are hard for me, I love drawing as an outlet. Opening up a sketchbook and trying my hand at a portrait or a funny animated character helps me smile again.

When you take stock in your achievements and where you still want to go, appreciating what you've already accomplished goes a long way. Gratitude is the key to joy, even if it's only because you understand how important life's basics are.

If you're healthy and able to go for what gets your excitement rising each morning, you have a lot to be thankful for—let that empower you.

“You’ll never see a happy ungrateful person.”

Zig Ziglar

3. You compare yourself to the wrong people.

We're all sold the idea, in America at least, that making it equals big paychecks, lots of sex, and a mansion the size of an art museum. You're not genuinely making it if you're missing these symbols of success.

Not valid for everyone, and it doesn't have to be what you desire either.

Why are you doing all of this? Is it a part of your life purpose, or because you saw someone else doing it and decided it would be cool?

Make specific, thoughtful choices. I decided a long time ago going after vast sums of money wasn't going to be my goal. Life taught me money makes things easier.

I had to understand it's OK to want to make a good salary to take care of basic needs and save for retirement; it took years to accept I enjoy travel and need enough for at least one adventure a year.

Maybe that's not necessary for everyone, but travel matters to me. Seeing the world helps me feel wealthy, and I love learning about other cultures and cities.

What do you need to benefit you, your family, and your overall mental health right now? Write down a list of your needs and wants. Getting serious about what matters to you as an individual, not what you think you "should" desire is a good goal.

Are you in a place mentally to work towards being a self-actualized human being? If you don't know where to go, you can't stay on the right road.

Once you have a list of what you truly want, you can find people who have done what you strive for and learn from their experiences. Read about them, or better yet, talk to them in person if you can.

You will reach your goals if you compare yourself to the right people. The people doing precisely what you aspire to do in your life.

“Don’t you find it odd,” she continued, “that when you’re a kid, everyone, all the world, encourages you to follow your dreams. But when you’re older, somehow they act offended if you even try.”
― Ethan Hawke, The Hottest State

Figure out a way to pursue your dreams

You have roadblocks to your goals. But if you get creative and find a way to go after your dreams, your life will feel loads more fulfilling and enjoyable.

No one said a good life would be easy.

Even doing what you love part-time, or dare I say, as a hobby, can create balance and instant smiles each morning you wake.

Take full responsibility for your life and do what it takes to do what you love. Yes, it may be more challenging if you're a person of color, or suffering an illness, but there are always ways to make things work.

• Take time to plan how to save enough money to give you the freedom to do more of your passions.

• Ask for help from people who can assist you on your journey or give you advice. Or, even better—mentoring.

• Work a job that doesn't take all of your brainpower, and do your passion during your off hours until you can do it full-time.

• Spend more time in groups with people who enjoy what you love. Life is less crappy when you spend it with others.

Permit yourself to love life by structuring it in a way that benefits your interests.

Keep your head in the right place. Not wanting too much all the time and giving thanks for what you have can change your outlook.

“I’ve been very blessed in my personal life and in my career and I have never been ungrateful for what I have.”

Mandy Patinkin

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Want more? If you’re struggling with doing original work, click here to join my (free) email list, and through comics, articles about culture, and living your truth, you can upgrade your mindset and share your art with the world.

One Concept a Teacher in Art School Gave Me That Changed My Life

And could help you reach your goals.

Photo by bruce mars on Unsplash

Walking into the art studio with my finished clay project in hand, I knew it was the best work I’d done in a long time. With other classes and homework to complete that week, I didn’t put much time into this one. Still, I was sure its creativity and energy would impress my professor.

Compared with sculptures from other students in class that day, I could tell theirs looked technically better. Mine had all the vitality, though!

I might have finished it quickly, but it was eye-catching.

The professor was surely going to give me a high grade and plenty of praise. Maybe even talk about how good it is to the rest of the class.

Little did I know, I was about to learn a lesson that would stick with me for the rest of my life.

When the teacher entered and started walking around the class, checking in with each student, I was hoping she would get to me last. I wanted her to be amazed by my brilliance after looking at the others.

I could see her face as she spotted my sculpture, my powerful piece of a man in a running pose with a loose shirt moving in the wind. Her head cocked to the side as she slowly approached my table. After pausing for a brief moment, she said, “The pose is dynamic, with a nice solid structure, but make sure to put more time and effort into your craftsmanship.”

Hold on a second. What kind of praise was that?

She liked it but wanted me to spend more time on details and making it look finished; she continued telling me further to make it a better quality final product. She was basically calling it energetic rubbish.

The professor used this opportunity to turn to the class and discuss the importance of craftsmanship. Right in front of my art — clearly, the example of what not to do.

I learned the importance, that day, of putting more effort into the finished product and calming my ego.

I thought all of the energy in my work would speak for itself. I didn’t understand how evident a lack of good craftsmanship can be in what you create. Needless to say, I was embarrassed and humbled.

Craftsmanship.

This word is one I would hear many times over my art education. The importance of craftsmanship and how that separates the novice from the professional.

Paying attention to details and putting in the time to create a quality piece of art was drilled into me after that. Fortunately, I learned to organize my time and put in the work.

Other than art, I believe we can use this concept to help improve our lives.

How to craft a life you love

After twenty years of creative life both here and abroad, I’ve found living with intention instead of haphazardly here and there helps bring what you desire.

Here’s a simple way to look at crafting your life.

Craftsmanship for success

Anytime life kicks you in the rear, or you feel you’re not going in the right direction, remember to put these three points into action.

1. Taking time to plan out goals in detail by writing them down and reading them daily

Put down all the possible ways these goals could be achieved and think about what connects them. Like creating a piece of art, you’re building the sketch or rough draft of your final product, working out the kinks, and developing a vision. Reading them to yourself as if you already have them, in the present, is like magic for attracting your desires.

2. Taking calculated risks instead of running from them

There’s no way around it. You must take risks if you want to succeed. Keeping them thoughtful and careful should be a part of your detailed goals. Even if you’re afraid, you will need to step out into the unknown at some point.

3. Taking time sculpting the life you want by consistently doing the work

Moving forward with consistent action will help your skills grow and give you more chances for luck. It might take more time filled with regular, daily work than you think, but you will reach success if you’re putting in the time regularly to produce.

Even when you’ve reached your goal, you should continue forward. There is no finish line. The work, the skills you learn, and the positive influence you have on others are how you measure success. If I can learn to put more effort into crafting a beautiful piece of art and apply it to my life, you can take a similar approach.

A successful life is an art, so start sculpting yours today.

7 Incredibly Easy Morning Routine Ideas

There’s so much more than just getting up early

“Morning routines sound good, but they’re too hard for me,” is what a lot of people say. What can you do to make them more comfortable and fit into your busy life? I’ll share seven ideas to add to your morning routine, but I want you to know this, you don’t have to do them all. You can make morning routines easier.

Adding even one from the list can make a huge difference in how you feel and approach your day. If you can do all of them, excellent. Just one or two? Awesome!

The benefits of getting your mind and body focused in the morning include helping to put you in the right frame of mind for your day, increasing productivity, and boosting your energy levels.

Maybe you’ve heard, or even read, the book “The Miracle Morning” by Hal Elrod. Out of all the articles I read on this topic, his book inspired me to make the most of the early hours. It helped me understand that a morning routine can be what you decide works best for your life and individual needs. It’s not an all-or-nothing practice where there are no benefits if you don’t do all the 127 things on your list.

I like the idea of flexibility, picking what you enjoy doing each morning and letting it be okay If you can’t do it all, for whatever reason.

We don’t have to deal with absolutes. Just because someone like well-known productivity master Elon Musk wakes up at 7 am every day and religiously checks his “critical emails” first thing doesn’t mean you have to do exactly the same.

Oprah is not an early riser — getting up around 8 am is natural for her — and then walking her dogs for fresh air and exercise to get her blood pumping. Pretty simple yet powerful.

Take a look at these possible morning activities and pick one or more that you can add to your routine each morning.

1. Getting up early

People love to debate the perfect time to get up early. Is it 4 am? 5? My advice is to work on getting up one hour earlier than you normally do, even if that takes away from your 8 hours of sleep. In my opinion, the 8 hours rule is overrated. Getting 6–8 hours is fine, then drink caffeine to get you going.

I put this as #1 because rising earlier gives you more time to do the things on your morning routine list and even creates time for doing things you love like reading or writing. More time in the morning is like the gift that keeps on giving.

I get up at 4:30 am to draw comics and write Medium articles. Throughout the day, thinking about all I was able to do in the morning, helps me feel energized — like a natural high.

2. Drinking water with lemon

Making sure to drink a tall glass of water when you first wake up is essential for hydration but squeezing in a slice of lemon brings it up a notch. Dropping the lemon slice into the water after the squeeze not only adds more flavor, you take in all that vitamin C and reap the benefits it provides for healthy skin and body.

Lemon in your water can help with weight loss as well. Research shows polyphenol antioxidants found in lemons substantially reduce weight gain in overfed mice. Yes, on mice, not humans, but the antioxidant compounds also offset the adverse effects on their blood glucose levels and improved insulin resistance. Not too shabby for sour fruit.

3. Appreciating what you have

One way to combat sadness and depression is by thinking about what you have and feeling grateful. Gratitude is an effective way of appreciating how lucky you are to be alive and paying attention to all you did to get where you are now.

Depending on your situation, you may be having such a challenging time in life right now that you have to go to the basics like giving thanks for sleeping well and waking up to a fresh new day. My gratitude thinking involves paying attention to how I feel inside when I think about what I have. This awareness connects with the next activity on the list…

4. Practicing mindfulness

Simply paying attention to how you feel and what you’re thinking can work wonders. Sitting quietly and taking deep breaths as you quiet your mind. This could mean ten to twenty minutes of meditation or sitting and paying attention to any fears or concerns you’re having about your day. Even reading books on spirituality can make you stop and put more awareness on right now.

Reading philosophy excerpts on stoicism, I keep a few books on my desk for easy access, which helps me get in a place to notice the present. How I choose to think dictates my life and well-being. If you don’t have much time, pay attention to how your body moves and how you feel as you get ready in the morning.

I love the idea of “Looking at your hands” as a way to notice what you’re doing and appreciating what you’re able to do. I’ll often take a second and note to myself, “My hands are typing right now.” or “I’m cooking dinner for my family.” The mix of gratitude and mindfulness this creates will help you take a deep breath and feel centered.

5. Moving your body

Giving yourself time for physical exercise or movement in the morning is magical for your thinking and physical energy. Any time, from a few minutes of stretching to thirty minutes of walking or yoga, will do wonders for your mindset.

I love doing yoga poses and taking walks. Suppose I can combine a short run with the walk, even better. I finish feeling awake, alert, and optimistic about what lies ahead.

6. Doing strength exercises

Doing strength exercises like push-ups or pull-ups or weight training, if you have a set up in your home, takes a lot of motivation to do in the morning. If you can get even a few minutes of resistance or muscle-building exercises in, though, you’ll feel stronger and more confident in just about all areas of your day.

I enjoy doing push-ups, and I tend to be off-and-on with pull-ups. They can make my wrists hurt, which makes it harder for me to enjoy drawing. That’s an excuse. I’m well aware because pull-ups are so hard for me. This makes me want to avoid them. Because of this, though, when I do pull-ups, I feel stronger for overcoming my fears.

Fit what you can in, and our last tip will bring it all together.

7. Saying what you want like you already have it

Affirmations are a classic morning ritual that many people feel can be a bit cheesy. I would say no morning routine is complete without a little personal positive encouragement.

You could do the standing in the mirror looking at yourself and loudly proclaiming, “I’m a success!” approach or choose to say positive affirmations to yourself in your head.

Unfortunately, I tend to think of the negatives about myself first. One thing that helps is re-framing my thinking. So, as soon as I think of something negatively, I switch it to a positive and say it as if it already exists. Instead of “I only have a few freelance writing gigs,” I’ll change it to, “I have so many writing gigs, I have to turn some down.” Whatever the subject matter, make sure to say affirmations in the present tense and feel as if you achieved them or have them right now.

You can do all of these if you have time in the morning. If not, do what you can. If you’re unsure which ones will stick or how many are right, try adding one new activity each week until you reach your desired number. You can scale back or adjust anytime you need.

Mornings are full of hope, and when you rise, your mind is open, well-rested, and ready for the new day. Give yourself the mental and physical boost to conquer each day with confidence and success. Choose your combination, even if your routine is different every day, and make it happen.

The Mandalorian Effect: If You’re Not Living by a Code, Your Mission in Life Will Most Likely Fail

Photo by Michael Marais on Unsplash

This is the way — to success

You are on a mission. A mission to reach success and live the life you’ve always dreamed of. If only you had a solid way of thinking and living to help guide you on your journey. It’s a big galaxy out there, but success is not as far, far away as it might seem.

My name is Din Djarin. I am a bounty hunter. You may know me as The Mandalorian. I’m here to impart my wisdom and moral code to you. Only if you choose to accept it.

Why you ask? After successfully delivering the child, baby Grogu, to Luke Skywalker of the Jedi Order, I’ve decided to take some time to put down my thoughts on success so that others can benefit. I have met others I thought lived by the Mandalorian way — such as never removing their helmet — but changed the rules to fit their personal needs.

With this in mind, I have come to understand you can start with beliefs you were taught as a child and build on them to create a code of your own to follow without fail. A code that helps you reach your goals with more ease. If you do not live by this code, I believe you will most likely fail.

As a Mandalorian, I have many sayings that I live by. Such as:

“Justice by single combat and always honoring one’s deals.” -The Mandalorians

I live by this but have also added new phrases that can help you on your travels towards prosperity. Whether it’s here or throughout the galaxy. If you are ready to level up, then follow my words.

Discipline is the true force

If you cannot consistently get the work done you vowed to complete, you will fail. No magic can save you. With life moving at lightspeed, you must practice discipline in all you do. Having the mindset to work consistently on your goals is the key. For that, you must decide to be a disciplined person — one who makes certain to complete all the tasks on their list no matter the circumstances.

I was trained from a young boy to follow what I was told by the elder Mandalorians. They taught me to listen and follow, but I have learned to take full responsibility for my life as a grown man. It is my job to take what they taught me, keep myself strong, and not blame them for my faults.

Only the discipline of adhering to daily training and hours of focused work will help you get where you want to go. Decide on why you are pursuing your mission. Make sure your “why” is compelling enough to get you up and rise to the challenge.

Establishing a routine gets you to your goals like riding a speeder bike — fast and direct

Find the same time each day to do the work. Use your disciplined mind to ensure you stick to a schedule you have planned out in advance. Do not throw your day together whenever it suits you. The morning is a productive time for getting thinking work done or exercising your body. When I rise, polishing my Mandalorian armor until it gleams is a cathartic practice. My mind is clear, and I am fully present with my thoughts as I plan the day ahead.

Utilize the technology of your planet and block off time in your day for what you must do. If you have trouble remembering, set a droid to remind you. Do what you must to make your routine into a habit, and your mind will expect to tackle everything on your list each day.

I believe in the mornings because no matter what planet I’m on, the sun rises and sets. Even if my days as a bounty hunter are unpredictable, at some point, the night will come, and I must sleep. Your routines will be accomplished if they are during times, you can always rely on.

Consistent practice sticks with you like an octopus attached to your ship

The truth is, you must practice improving. Remember that the amount of time does matter, but not as much as what you practice. Make sure it is of value.

Study the masters and discover what they practiced. Learn what you must to grow and then go all-in on your training every day.

Maneuvering the Razor Crest during a chase is definitely a stressful situation but, because of the flight training I acquired working with experienced pilots as a youth, knowing how and where to move to evade danger is now intuitive. I might not always get away, but from practice and experience, I have a fighting chance.

When you have focus, consistency, and patience, anything is possible. There were days when I thought Grogu would never get to the Jedi. I could not see the way forward. I know now that my singular focus on that goal, combined with consistent action, invariably led to a person who could assist us. My training helped us escape perilous situations, attracted a little luck, and manifested good fortune.

Photo by Jimmy Nguyen on Unsplash

All of this would not have been possible without living by a code I adhere to through good times and bad. Write out yours. Make decisions about how you will live your life and stick to them as closely as possible.

One day you will be able to share your code with others and tell them, “This is the way.”

Star Wars, The Mandalorian, and its characters are the property of Disney and Lucasfilm.

Want to Learn to Nap on a Train? Here’s how

Sometimes you need to sleep. I’m talking about amongst the people, on a train or bus, or even in the park. Life can be exhausting. Why can’t we do some of our recharging in public? 

Well, now you can, with this simple three-step method inspired by my years living in Japan. The word “inemuri” means being present while you sleep. It’s synonymous with sleeping on the job or in public places. The Japanese are so overworked that it’s become commonplace to see a large number of people sleeping just about anywhere.

Taking naps is said to be a good thing. Even though accepted in Japan, it’s not allowed at work—even though that rule is mostly ignored all the time. If you’re in a location where you can set an alarm to wake you, it’s relatively easy, but what if you’re on a train or the subway? Not waking up in time for your stop can be frightening. 

Listen in as our Japanese raccoon, Tanuki, from Fried Chicken and Sushi comics explores how to nap on the subway in three steps. 

1. Decide to give it a try with the intent to master inemuri with help from others.

2. Pick a friend or family member who you know would never let their guard down.

3. Ride on a train with a loudspeaker that penetrates your soul.

Great job! If you follow these Tanuki steps, you too will be sleeping on the train in no time. Just imagine the freedom you’ll have to get the rest you need anywhere you have to wait. 

Take these tips to the cafe, while waiting for your coffee, or to the DMV, waiting for your number to be called. There are so many uses, and you’ll feel well-rested and ready to tackle whatever life throws at you daily.

Now, get out there and nap.

To Create, or Not to Create, While in Quarantine

That is the questions. Here’s the answer.

Illustration by Khalid Birdsong

Waking up at the crack of dawn to draw and write is no easy task, but I’ve grown accustomed to it. Today, on the other hand, I couldn’t help but feel the pull of the bed calling me back.

This is normal in regular times but much more powerful recently. Is it smarter to push through and get work done during these stressful times or give your body the extra rest it needs?

I chose to stay up and fumbled around, getting my coffee made. Doing marketing tasks like scheduling future social media posts, and writing possible gags for new comic strips — nothing all that heavy. When I start this way, it usually leads to turning my engine on and getting deeper into a creative drive. Where I’m eventually motivated to make more focused work like drawing or writing articles.

Perhaps you’re like me. Sandwiched between your desire to rest more and the awareness of all you could achieve during this forced-flexible time at home due to quarantine.

The two opposing questions floating around in my head always — Why not use this time to get more done? On the other hand — Why should I force myself to do anything during such a major pandemic?

The world needs your art during this time. Your perspective, voice, and experiences can help others. It’s incredibly important for you to find a way to put your work out there.

Here’s what I think is going on and what I discovered we can do to move forward towards our artistic goals.

Stop feeling guilty

Reading articles about famous people in the past, like Isaac Newton, who discovered the theory of relativity during a quarantine. Or, was that Einstein? Didn’t Shakespeare write a famous play while sheltering at home? I bet someone wrote a brilliant piece of classical music while forced to hide away from a plague. Something like that. I think all the motivational articles are getting jumbled up in my head.

The point is, they make you feel like this time of quarantine is not for letting it all go and slowing down, but for working harder. For creating something brand new and absolutely fantastic.

You start feeling concerned about yourself and, yes, guilty. Why can’t I make something earth-changing during this time? There are more opportunities to focus on smaller projects. Isn’t this what people will expect of a creative person?

There’s only one truth to accept.

Creatives get overwhelmed, frightened, and exhausted by world events, just like “normal” humans. We’re not above or beyond it only because we can escape to other places in our minds.

There are times when we make stuff with ease and times when we need to just sit and stare out into space to process it all. With nothing but a clean slate of negative thoughts in our heads and swirling mixed emotions in our hearts.

I want to have the freedom to work when my creative energy is turned on, but I’m afraid that if I get out of a routine, I’ll just stop and not make anything anymore. My momentum will hit a wall and seep into the gutter.

“Nothing can bring you peace but yourself.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

When I recognize this is what’s going on, I change how much I expect to get done. If you’re feeling this same guilt and overwhelm, schedule time to work but limit it. Instead of an hour, work for thirty-minutes.

There’s nothing wrong with cutting back.

Go ahead and be exhausted

Taking life a day at a time is something I need to improve on. I’ve seen more than ever how good days can be full of powerful, productive energy, and others are a slow drag to even begin.

This past weekend I was completely out of it. I felt like strings were attached to my limbs, and someone was pulling down on them, making it hard for me to move. Heavy body and mind issues plus plenty of chores to take care of around the house, forced me to make an important decision.

I needed to “do” less and let some things go. I’m just too tired.

Feeling exhausted right now is ok. It’s more than ok. You should expect it and give yourself some time off.

The only way to have productive days right now is to give yourself “processing time” to recharge on those tired, emotionally exhausting days.

Give yourself time to ease in

The struggle to produce content just happened to me today. This morning, in fact. What you’re reading is a result of gradually working my way to writing this article.

If you know that starting off not wanting to work but doing small things to help you transform into a “focused flow state productive mind,” is possible, you can have more confidence in the process.

“Smile, breathe, and go slowly.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

Celebrate your wins

You should definitely create your writing, art, and music while in quarantine. Take a hybrid approach by dedicating yourself to both your mental health through regular periods of rest and your need to create with longer than typical stretches of scheduled work times. This way, you know you have the time to gradually get into the groove.

“Life is 10 percent what you experience and 90 percent how you respond to it.” ~Dorothy M. Neddermeyer

Even if it seems like you only completed a few tasks, celebrate them. I had to tell myself, “Good Job!” today for getting something done, even though I was totally not in the mood at first. We could always do more.

Make good friends with patience and invite understanding into the mix. I know you will keep the creative momentum going and succeed in artistically expressing yourself.

Even while trapped inside this box, we call quarantine.

Do People Fall Off of Treadmills at the Gym?

I can’t be the only one…

I'm not a gym guy. I've tried several times, but I can't make it work for me the way my friends can. My mind gets overwhelmed and discombobulated every time I enter one and try to use the machines.

I know, making it a habit would probably help. Over time I'd memorize how to use each one and gain more confidence.

But I ask you, is it really worth it to commit to a gym?

Why are so many people willing to spend their time and energy moving their bodies, sweating like the crazy, stuck inside of a building?

"Spinning" on bikes that don't move. Running on treadmills that go nowhere while watching HGTV.

What are we, human hamsters?

It makes me want to walk around, yelling at people, "Stop working so hard to go nowhere! I know it's cold outside but have some balls. Get a real bike and ride! Ride to an actual place. Move forward. Go somewhere in life!"

To be fair, I can see going to a gym as a win if it's the only way you get motivated to exercise.

You get to drive, not walk or bike, to a building that is enclosed, shut off from the real world, where you can escape.

Like taking a trip to Exercise Land.

Walking in, you see beautiful in-shape bodies, a few that could use some work, and the gym wakes up your senses. And your jealousy.

"I gotta spin and lift too so I can look like all of these Greek Gods."

You smell the motivation in the air. Or is that athlete's foot? Either way, you're pumped.

That's how I try to feel when I enter a gym. It's usually one a friend invites me to in hopes I fall in love with the overpriced sweat house.

It all seems so magical. So, encouraging. Until I walk up to my nemesis.

The treadmill.

Theoretically, I should be able to step on it and just start walking. I'm sure that's how they were back in the olden' days.

Everything has to be so damn advanced now that I have to anxiously go through pressing buttons and choosing settings just to start.

I only want to get moving so I can go nowhere like everyone else.

The super-fit woman to the right of me who clearly has been running for seventeen straight hours tries not to watch me fumble around with the treadmill motherboard.

The guy on the left just gives a smirk. I bet he's thinking, "Look, a new guy. What a loser. He probably wastes all of his time running outside. In...nature."

Once I figure out a setting that will make the treadmill move, I can finally start walking. The choices don't end there, though.

I have to choose a TV station to watch. Here I am taking a stroll and channel surfing. Trying to enjoy the multi-tasking, first-world problem of what to watch while breathing hard and sweating.

After going through all the channels, you know where I end up.

HGTV.

Walking turns to jogging. The feeling is incredible. The treadmill surface is softer than the hard concrete, so I get the false sense that I can run farther than I ever can out in the elements.

I'm jogging while watching a couple remodel their mid-century modern home. Continually checking how many imaginary miles I've completed here in this building of "No pain, no gain."

One mile. I ran one mile. It feels like ten. Probably because I'm still in the same place I started.

Slowing down to a walk again seems like an excellent idea. Change up the pace, like interval training.

Boy, was I wrong.

As I ease back into a walk, I start feeling dizzy. Do you feel like this on one of these things too?

Like a fool, I blame it on HGTV.

Changing the channel will help. I reach for the channel button, the room spins, and I fall forward onto the treadmill.

Or is it back as the moving surface pulls me down and onto the floor?

What do you know, the treadmill surface stops moving. No buttons to press. I just had to fall on my face.

The lady on the right looks surprised for a second but can't stop running, she's too close to completing her five thousand miles.

The guy on the left keeps running but yells out, "You okay, dude?!"

I get myself up slowly, give a shy wave to my super athletic neighbors, and hobble away in shame.

My knee hurts from the fall but not as much as—let's say it together—my pride.

Please tell me falling off treadmills is something that happens at gyms regularly.

It can't only be my failed attempt at running in place.