Read This if You Feel You’re Too Old for Success

You’ll need more than just changing your mindset

Are we finally in a place where anyone of any age can succeed in their chosen profession? Even though I’m yearning to tell the story of how Colonel Sanders started Kentucky Fried Chicken when he was 65 years old, I’m going to hold myself back.

At this point in history, his story shouldn’t be all that astounding. It certainly was in the ’70s and 80s, but now, we should be more open to the fact that you’re never too old to go after your dreams.

Unless, of course, you want to play professional sports after 40. There are areas where physical strength and stamina matter, but on the whole, if you have your mind and a passion in your heart to pursue, age is just that, a number.

At least, now that I’m in my mid-forties, that’s what I think people should believe. I’m sick and tired of feeling down about aging. As a husband, parent, teacher, writer, and cartoonist, I see how much I’m capable of doing now, even though my life is crazy busy.

So much of life is about our mindset. The time is now to realize success over 40 is not only possible but pretty darn impressive.

Being young and successful is cool and all but let’s see you sustain that for 40 years

Why do people still feel it’s better to become a success when you’re young? What’s wrong with just having a goal of supporting yourself without needing help from your parents?

This idea that the most extraordinary success comes with youth is ridiculous. Let’s be real here, what have you done in your 20s that qualifies you to get more respect than someone in their 50s?

Gaining life experience and wisdom is honorable. Making a good life for yourself and keeping it up for decades is a skill not everyone can master. When you add factors like marriage, parenting, and surprise health issues, holding on to a successful career as you age takes a herculean effort.

Yes, when you’re young, you have the energy to work hard and move up in a company, the balls to take risks with a new business, and the nerve to ride on the coattails of successful friends to find success.

But can you sustain it?

The one thing young people can’t see is that you have to maintain that success for another thirty to forty years. Trends change, the needs of society shift. Are you flexible enough to move with the times and stay in demand?

Here are three tips I’ve found for helping sustain a long career.

• Find pleasure in the creative and business aspects of your profession.

• Stay open to new ideas, learning new skills, and growing as a person.

• Manage your stress, so you avoid burnout.

The trick will be to discover your unique techniques and ways of thinking to stay strong and balanced during the marathon of a long career.

Why are you letting age hold you back from pursuing your passion?

If you’re physically and mentally able, go for it. Don’t let anybody tell you that you can’t.

For many of us, life can get pretty busy in middle age. You can have more available time for doing what you love when you get older.

My aunt would always tell me there are different seasons of life — pay attention to where you are and do the best you can while there. We will have seasons where it’s all about our career, a season of raising children, or a season of healing from an illness.

Seasons come and go.

Take an honest look at where you are in life and be clear about what you can accomplish. If you’re in a season where you have more time to pursue a business or passion, but you think you’re past your prime, think again.

You may need to ease in and warm up to start something great. Doing small things towards your goals can build up momentum to a place where you feel like doing more, and then, BAM, your mindset changes.

Suddenly, you see that you still have what it takes to succeed. Not only that, but you’ve been through enough in life to know you’re tough enough to keep going.

“You can start late, look different, be uncertain, and still succeed.” — Misty Copeland

Who decides what age you can start something new? Especially in the era of the internet

“It’s just too late for me.” How many times have I heard people say that? People who remember a time before the internet. A time when getting attention for the work you do was so much harder.

The age of gatekeepers is disappearing. Someone at a company deciding whether your work is good enough or you’re relevant enough to be pushed out to the masses.

You choose when you’re ready and can share work with the world.

The internet is a place to promote what you do, but there’s one skill you must master to make it work for you.

Consistency.

Posting online now and then about your work isn’t going to attract eyeballs and new fans. You have to post, promote, and share your work at least one to three times per week on your chosen platforms.

Having the internet is magnificent, but if you’re not willing to put in the regular weekly effort of sharing work for viewers, readers, and potential customers to consume, nothing’s going to happen.

If you have a goal, you can’t shake, ignore your age, pursue it and see where it takes you

If you’re able to update your mindset to believe that success is possible at any age, you can make miracles happen.

Just remember these suggestions for success over 40.

• Cultivate an interest in all the work you do and find pleasure in aspects of the business that may be challenging.

• Keep an open mind so that you’re ready to learn new skills to keep up with the times.

• Manage your stress by finding ways to have fun and relax every day.

• Do little things, taking small steps every day to reach your goals.

• Post and promote your work online consistently to reap the benefits of the massive potential audience the internet provides.

Understand that, even though you may feel old or society tries to tell you there’s very little time left to succeed in your passions, you can still play the long game.

Change your outlook and your attitude and start taking steps towards more success, no matter your age.

One Concept a Teacher in Art School Gave Me That Changed My Life

And could help you reach your goals.

Photo by bruce mars on Unsplash

Walking into the art studio with my finished clay project in hand, I knew it was the best work I’d done in a long time. With other classes and homework to complete that week, I didn’t put much time into this one. Still, I was sure its creativity and energy would impress my professor.

Compared with sculptures from other students in class that day, I could tell theirs looked technically better. Mine had all the vitality, though!

I might have finished it quickly, but it was eye-catching.

The professor was surely going to give me a high grade and plenty of praise. Maybe even talk about how good it is to the rest of the class.

Little did I know, I was about to learn a lesson that would stick with me for the rest of my life.

When the teacher entered and started walking around the class, checking in with each student, I was hoping she would get to me last. I wanted her to be amazed by my brilliance after looking at the others.

I could see her face as she spotted my sculpture, my powerful piece of a man in a running pose with a loose shirt moving in the wind. Her head cocked to the side as she slowly approached my table. After pausing for a brief moment, she said, “The pose is dynamic, with a nice solid structure, but make sure to put more time and effort into your craftsmanship.”

Hold on a second. What kind of praise was that?

She liked it but wanted me to spend more time on details and making it look finished; she continued telling me further to make it a better quality final product. She was basically calling it energetic rubbish.

The professor used this opportunity to turn to the class and discuss the importance of craftsmanship. Right in front of my art — clearly, the example of what not to do.

I learned the importance, that day, of putting more effort into the finished product and calming my ego.

I thought all of the energy in my work would speak for itself. I didn’t understand how evident a lack of good craftsmanship can be in what you create. Needless to say, I was embarrassed and humbled.

Craftsmanship.

This word is one I would hear many times over my art education. The importance of craftsmanship and how that separates the novice from the professional.

Paying attention to details and putting in the time to create a quality piece of art was drilled into me after that. Fortunately, I learned to organize my time and put in the work.

Other than art, I believe we can use this concept to help improve our lives.

How to craft a life you love

After twenty years of creative life both here and abroad, I’ve found living with intention instead of haphazardly here and there helps bring what you desire.

Here’s a simple way to look at crafting your life.

Craftsmanship for success

Anytime life kicks you in the rear, or you feel you’re not going in the right direction, remember to put these three points into action.

1. Taking time to plan out goals in detail by writing them down and reading them daily

Put down all the possible ways these goals could be achieved and think about what connects them. Like creating a piece of art, you’re building the sketch or rough draft of your final product, working out the kinks, and developing a vision. Reading them to yourself as if you already have them, in the present, is like magic for attracting your desires.

2. Taking calculated risks instead of running from them

There’s no way around it. You must take risks if you want to succeed. Keeping them thoughtful and careful should be a part of your detailed goals. Even if you’re afraid, you will need to step out into the unknown at some point.

3. Taking time sculpting the life you want by consistently doing the work

Moving forward with consistent action will help your skills grow and give you more chances for luck. It might take more time filled with regular, daily work than you think, but you will reach success if you’re putting in the time regularly to produce.

Even when you’ve reached your goal, you should continue forward. There is no finish line. The work, the skills you learn, and the positive influence you have on others are how you measure success. If I can learn to put more effort into crafting a beautiful piece of art and apply it to my life, you can take a similar approach.

A successful life is an art, so start sculpting yours today.

What Getting Out of Your Comfort Zone Really Takes

Here’s a hint, it’s not only courage.

Photo by Jametlene Reskp on Unsplash

I have a friend who always talks about making significant changes in his life but never does. He says he wants to change careers and move to another city, but he avoids taking steps to make the leap.

Why?

I know you’re thinking he’s just afraid of the unknown, but I believe it’s more than that.

After spending the past twenty years of my life moving around and even living overseas in Japan, I know what motivated me to step out of my comfort zone.

I wish I could say it was because I’m so brave, and “risk” is my middle name. That’s not true at all. I’m actually afraid of change and scared of the unknown.

What drives me forward — and what my friend could use more of–is curiosity.

One of my goals is to ignite this spirit of curiosity when teaching my students and get them to ask more questions. Good questions lead to knowing more, seeing more, and ultimately experiencing more than what you have inside your bubble of safety.

Here’s the thing — even though it feels nice and warm in that bubble, your determination to discover more and get those questions answered will shove your fears aside. You’ll have the confidence to burst out of your comfort zone.

Fears will still be there, just not barking at you as loud as they were. You’ll have a reason that propels you forward and gives you the confidence to face uncertainty.

Curiosity charges up your “why” with more power than your fears.

Not only in making life moves, but in establishing new relationships. Suppose you’re looking to meet new friends or start dating again after a tough breakup. In that case, it’s been proven curiosity can be the key to personal growth.

Their study concludes that the degree to which people are curious actively influences their personal growth opportunities and the level of intimacy that develops when they meet someone new.

-Patricia Donovan

Sometimes “What if?” Looking back on my life, what if I was never curious about Japanese culture and language? I would never have had the balls to move there to teach English.

My interest in the Japanese language was strong. Still, I’ve always been too shy to speak other languages easily in front of people.

As the only foreigner in my town, living in Japan forced me to learn Japanese and speak it often. I had to push past my fears and face the embarrassment of mispronouncing words in front of native speakers.

What if, when another American teacher of English invited me to hang out with her new Japanese girlfriends and mentioned, “They’re both single!” and If I had said, “No, thanks.”

I would never have met my wife.

I needed to follow the curiosity and interest in who her friends were. Of course, they might have been people I didn’t get along well with, and we could have had a terrible time together. It was a risk I will take because I was curious.

Curiosity leads me overseas and to meeting the woman of my dreams. Travel and relationships aren’t easy, but they’re an example of how your life can change if you are interested in the wider world.

What about my friend who’s afraid of making changes? I wouldn’t give him unsolicited advice, but here are the benefits of curiosity I would share if he ever asks.

When you live with an active sense of curiosity:

You will never get bored

Having an interest in many new things means learning and adjusting regularly. Yes, the positive side effect is never getting bored.

How could you when you constantly have new experiences and relationships to navigate and explore?

If you ever run out of interest, ask more questions.

You will learn to embrace discomfort

There’s always going to be discomfort in any decision or path you choose to take. If you say it’s too scary and do nothing, you’ll have to deal with the discomfort of not reaching your goals.

When you decide to go for it, there’s also discomfort, but for something you really want.

Choose the discomfort that gets you closer to your dreams.

If you want to move forward in life, you’d better become familiar with and embrace the fear.

You will approach life with an open mind as a learner and observer

Living with curiosity also means you will have an easier time remembering information and a more accessible time learning skills connected with your new pursuits. As you learn more, you have a deeper understanding of how things work and why people are the way they are. You grow.

This will help open your mind and create even more questions you want answers to down the line. Each part of what you do in business and life will take on new meaning.

Conclusion

Live with curiosity. It hurts me to have friends who are not interested in experiencing more of what life offers just because of their fear. When you’re aware of your comfort zone, know that you can choose to step out and do more.

All you have to do is to be curious and follow where your questions lead you.

7 Incredibly Easy Morning Routine Ideas

There’s so much more than just getting up early

“Morning routines sound good, but they’re too hard for me,” is what a lot of people say. What can you do to make them more comfortable and fit into your busy life? I’ll share seven ideas to add to your morning routine, but I want you to know this, you don’t have to do them all. You can make morning routines easier.

Adding even one from the list can make a huge difference in how you feel and approach your day. If you can do all of them, excellent. Just one or two? Awesome!

The benefits of getting your mind and body focused in the morning include helping to put you in the right frame of mind for your day, increasing productivity, and boosting your energy levels.

Maybe you’ve heard, or even read, the book “The Miracle Morning” by Hal Elrod. Out of all the articles I read on this topic, his book inspired me to make the most of the early hours. It helped me understand that a morning routine can be what you decide works best for your life and individual needs. It’s not an all-or-nothing practice where there are no benefits if you don’t do all the 127 things on your list.

I like the idea of flexibility, picking what you enjoy doing each morning and letting it be okay If you can’t do it all, for whatever reason.

We don’t have to deal with absolutes. Just because someone like well-known productivity master Elon Musk wakes up at 7 am every day and religiously checks his “critical emails” first thing doesn’t mean you have to do exactly the same.

Oprah is not an early riser — getting up around 8 am is natural for her — and then walking her dogs for fresh air and exercise to get her blood pumping. Pretty simple yet powerful.

Take a look at these possible morning activities and pick one or more that you can add to your routine each morning.

1. Getting up early

People love to debate the perfect time to get up early. Is it 4 am? 5? My advice is to work on getting up one hour earlier than you normally do, even if that takes away from your 8 hours of sleep. In my opinion, the 8 hours rule is overrated. Getting 6–8 hours is fine, then drink caffeine to get you going.

I put this as #1 because rising earlier gives you more time to do the things on your morning routine list and even creates time for doing things you love like reading or writing. More time in the morning is like the gift that keeps on giving.

I get up at 4:30 am to draw comics and write Medium articles. Throughout the day, thinking about all I was able to do in the morning, helps me feel energized — like a natural high.

2. Drinking water with lemon

Making sure to drink a tall glass of water when you first wake up is essential for hydration but squeezing in a slice of lemon brings it up a notch. Dropping the lemon slice into the water after the squeeze not only adds more flavor, you take in all that vitamin C and reap the benefits it provides for healthy skin and body.

Lemon in your water can help with weight loss as well. Research shows polyphenol antioxidants found in lemons substantially reduce weight gain in overfed mice. Yes, on mice, not humans, but the antioxidant compounds also offset the adverse effects on their blood glucose levels and improved insulin resistance. Not too shabby for sour fruit.

3. Appreciating what you have

One way to combat sadness and depression is by thinking about what you have and feeling grateful. Gratitude is an effective way of appreciating how lucky you are to be alive and paying attention to all you did to get where you are now.

Depending on your situation, you may be having such a challenging time in life right now that you have to go to the basics like giving thanks for sleeping well and waking up to a fresh new day. My gratitude thinking involves paying attention to how I feel inside when I think about what I have. This awareness connects with the next activity on the list…

4. Practicing mindfulness

Simply paying attention to how you feel and what you’re thinking can work wonders. Sitting quietly and taking deep breaths as you quiet your mind. This could mean ten to twenty minutes of meditation or sitting and paying attention to any fears or concerns you’re having about your day. Even reading books on spirituality can make you stop and put more awareness on right now.

Reading philosophy excerpts on stoicism, I keep a few books on my desk for easy access, which helps me get in a place to notice the present. How I choose to think dictates my life and well-being. If you don’t have much time, pay attention to how your body moves and how you feel as you get ready in the morning.

I love the idea of “Looking at your hands” as a way to notice what you’re doing and appreciating what you’re able to do. I’ll often take a second and note to myself, “My hands are typing right now.” or “I’m cooking dinner for my family.” The mix of gratitude and mindfulness this creates will help you take a deep breath and feel centered.

5. Moving your body

Giving yourself time for physical exercise or movement in the morning is magical for your thinking and physical energy. Any time, from a few minutes of stretching to thirty minutes of walking or yoga, will do wonders for your mindset.

I love doing yoga poses and taking walks. Suppose I can combine a short run with the walk, even better. I finish feeling awake, alert, and optimistic about what lies ahead.

6. Doing strength exercises

Doing strength exercises like push-ups or pull-ups or weight training, if you have a set up in your home, takes a lot of motivation to do in the morning. If you can get even a few minutes of resistance or muscle-building exercises in, though, you’ll feel stronger and more confident in just about all areas of your day.

I enjoy doing push-ups, and I tend to be off-and-on with pull-ups. They can make my wrists hurt, which makes it harder for me to enjoy drawing. That’s an excuse. I’m well aware because pull-ups are so hard for me. This makes me want to avoid them. Because of this, though, when I do pull-ups, I feel stronger for overcoming my fears.

Fit what you can in, and our last tip will bring it all together.

7. Saying what you want like you already have it

Affirmations are a classic morning ritual that many people feel can be a bit cheesy. I would say no morning routine is complete without a little personal positive encouragement.

You could do the standing in the mirror looking at yourself and loudly proclaiming, “I’m a success!” approach or choose to say positive affirmations to yourself in your head.

Unfortunately, I tend to think of the negatives about myself first. One thing that helps is re-framing my thinking. So, as soon as I think of something negatively, I switch it to a positive and say it as if it already exists. Instead of “I only have a few freelance writing gigs,” I’ll change it to, “I have so many writing gigs, I have to turn some down.” Whatever the subject matter, make sure to say affirmations in the present tense and feel as if you achieved them or have them right now.

You can do all of these if you have time in the morning. If not, do what you can. If you’re unsure which ones will stick or how many are right, try adding one new activity each week until you reach your desired number. You can scale back or adjust anytime you need.

Mornings are full of hope, and when you rise, your mind is open, well-rested, and ready for the new day. Give yourself the mental and physical boost to conquer each day with confidence and success. Choose your combination, even if your routine is different every day, and make it happen.

Can You Stay Who You Are While Living Overseas?

Photo by note thanun on Unsplash

I know people who believe you can never change

“If I move to another country, I’m staying myself. There’s no way I’m becoming a different person.” 

A coworker said to me after telling him about my experiences living in Japan for two years, meeting my wife, and explaining how the experience changed me for the better. I shared that I had to become a different person while living there. The look of utter disbelief on his face threw me off. 

He couldn’t see something like that happening to him. He explained further, “You never stop being who you are just because you’re in a different place. I’m always me at my core.” 

I understood where he was coming from but disagreed and couldn’t think of what to say at the time in response. I knew for a fact this person never lived overseas. How could he know? I learned that he had visited other countries, sometimes for several weeks, but never spent a year or more in one. Let alone a country in Asia. 

Living as an expat takes an open mind and a great deal of flexibility. 

I believe, to respect the culture you’re living in, you have to change some of who you are if you hope to join in and succeed. Some of it means living the saying “When in Rome, do as the Romans do.” 

The other side involves making peace with becoming a different person. You can’t stop it from happening. Accepting your change doesn’t make you weak. 

If you’re a good person at heart, I think you can stay you deep down, but you will grow and evolve. I’ve seen how living abroad can change people for the worse and how they can even surprise themselves. 

As soon as you leave a familiar environment and accept the fact that you’re not going back to it anytime soon, you change. 

The jolt of culture shock hits right after arriving in Japan.  

I moved to Osaka to teach English in Junior High Schools with the JET Programme. My interest in learning about the country, culture, and language brought me there. The application process for JET took almost a year, so I was thrilled when I was accepted and finally arrived.

JET chooses where to place you but gives you the option of living in the city, suburbs, or countryside. I’m not a big city person, so I chose the suburbs. Even though I knew very little Japanese, I figured there would be enough people who spoke English there to help me settle into life. 

I was wrong.

Another JET teacher who lived in a town nearby was sent to my little area of Shimamoto, thirty minutes north of Osaka city by train, to help show me the basics. The apartment JET chose for me was old and unfurnished. I had to shop for futon mattresses, no western-style bed, that I would roll out every night to sleep right on the tatami mat floor. Totally different from how I slept in the U.S.  

August, one of the hottest months in Japan, and my air conditioning unit was broken. I met the other JET teacher in town, and she told me I could buy a new one, but it might take a few days to get it delivered and installed. Of course, she, or someone who could speak Japanese, would need to come with me to buy one.

I remember crying alone that night thinking, “What have I done?” Traveled across the world from Atlanta, Georgia, to Osaka, Japan, without friends or family to live in an old hot, and humid apartment without air conditioning. The culture shock hit me hard. 

Someone had to help me open a bank account, teach me how to get around on the subway. I worked in a school where I was the only non-Japanese person and couldn’t understand what anyone said.

Needless to say, I was uncomfortable. Living with discomfort was my everyday reality.   

Did this change me? How could you say it wouldn’t? 

I had experience with living abroad as a youth. My father worked as a diplomat, and I was fortunate to live in countries like Germany and the Bahamas during my middle school years. Moving to Germany was difficult because I didn’t speak the language. It was scary going out with family and not knowing what people were saying. 

The way of life was similar enough to America I found. People were a little more reserved and private than in Georgia and took a long time to get to know you. Over time, I learned to understand the people and culture. I got the idea that the language barrier and having patience with settling in was the most challenging part about living in another country.     

Traveling to live in Japan as an adult changed me even further. I was still me, but I discovered there can be much more to adjusting to a place when it’s very different than anywhere you’ve lived before. 

I truly became a new version of myself.

If I had time to explain all of this to my coworker and condense it down clearly and concisely, I wonder if he would see my side? 

Yes. You could be stubborn. Try and decide to behave like nothing in this new country can change you. I have a few ways this might prove difficult, however. Especially if you live in an Asian country where so much is so different. 

The rules of polite society force you to change. 

When you meet new people in Japan, you bow instead of shake hands. If you decide that just isn’t you and try to force a handshake, it will come off as odd or worse, rude. Not only do you bow, but you must learn not to bow too low depending on who you’re with. If you’re with a manager or an elder and you only give a little head nod, you’ll look like you’re being disrespectful. 

Learning these specific cultural rules was exciting to me, but I didn’t catch on all that fast. I can’t even count the number of times I bent my head down low to bow for the principal at my school, and someone pulled me aside later to let me know, “Your bow. It was too low.”

Eventually, I learned but let me tell you, I still make mistakes today. Not growing up with this custom means it isn’t second nature and can be frustrating at times. Learning how to bow is a part of living in Japan; you must learn.   

You are seen as a foreigner and not a citizen.

As an expat in Japan, you’re seen as a minority, even though you might have been part of the majority in your home country. Several white friends of mine had a real hard time with this realization. They stood out everywhere and weren’t used to it. 

They were seen as exotic and strange yet cool and interesting but not looked at as equals. Not as Japanese. If you don’t look Asian, you will be seen as a foreigner immediately—you can’t blend in. Even if you’ve lived in Japan for thirty years. 

You start to see yourself differently. Wondering what you can do to fit in. Learning to speak Japanese to communicate better or working for a Japanese company might help. Perhaps, but on the outside, you’ll still look foreign—different.

What might this do to you over a long period of time? Thinking it won’t mold you into a different person isn’t realistic. 

Getting away with more than in your home country.

Looking different and being a foreigner in Japan has its advantages as well. You can get away with not following some of the rules of society in ways Japanese people can’t. No one will expect you to be an expert with all the rules of Japanese society. 

Some Japanese friends you make may feel envious of how much more relaxed your life can be in Japan compared to theirs. 

When my wife and I were visiting Tokyo several years ago, we had our suitcase with us after checking out of our hotel but wanted to do more sightseeing. A major hotel chain in the area we wanted to explore had a line of people, staying at the hotel, no doubt, giving their bags over to be held until they checked in. I had the idea to act like we were staying there and ask them to hold our suitcase until we come back in a few hours.

My Japanese wife, thought it wouldn’t work, especially if she’s with me. As a tall Black man from America, I could probably get away with it by myself, though. I had to try. 

Sure enough, I got in line, fully expecting someone to ask me which room I’m staying in or to show proof I checked in at the hotel, but no. They just smiled, took my bag, and gave me a return ticket—as my wife watched in amazement at a distance.

This is called a “Gaijin Smash” by some expats. When you take advantage of a situation, most Japanese citizens can’t because you know you won’t get in trouble. The word “gaijin” is slang for foreigners. This fact makes overseas travelers say and do things they never would at home, somewhat like foreigner privilege. 

There’s no way I would have tried something like this in America. I felt a bit guilty for flexing my foreign powers, but we were able to enjoy the rest of the day without lugging our suitcase around. When I came to pick my bag up, they happily returned it free of charge with no questions asked. 

The fact that this is possible changes you. You rationalize and try to make it okay by thinking of all your frustrations with living in the country. Reviewing in your head the times you didn’t fit in, made mistakes, and embarrassed yourself. The studying like crazy to learn the language and never speaking quite fluently enough. “I deserve some breaks every now and then.” you think. 

Living in Japan is hard. Making a life for yourself is challenging anywhere, let alone in a foreign country. 

The expat exceptionalism can consume you. Unless you paid attention to how you’ve changed and decided what stays and what goes, it could turn you into a monster. Recognizing the privilege that comes with being different in Japan means thinking deeply about your actions and who you are. 

I don’t think I did as much of that before Japan.  

Allowing people who are different from us to open our minds. 

Learning to live in another culture can help you appreciate differences and see people for who they are as humans. Because of this, you’re forced to look in the mirror at yourself and your beliefs. In fact, that can be the most challenging part of travel. 

My coworker may feel like living abroad could never change him, but it’s inevitable. You will change. 

If you live in Europe, maybe not as much. Surely, you will need to adjust to different cultural expectations there, too, and different attitudes towards world politics, religion, and relationships. You will still grow and change.   

If we can see that as a good side effect to travel and accept rather than reject how we’ve adapted to new environments, our tolerance for differences will grow. I hope more people will spend time in other countries and take on the personal growth involved in living abroad. 

You can read Khalid Birdsong’s comic strip inspired by his experiences living in Japan at www.friedchickenandsushi.com 

Use This Mindset Shift to Consume Less and Create More

Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

Complaining about not getting enough done was a constant issue for me. The funny thing was, I was complaining while watching TV shows or scrolling through my phone.

With so much content to read and watch, it was difficult to say no. I made it a habit to complain about distractions in the world getting in the way of my productivity until I realized it’s my choice to turn off screens and decide how much time I spend on them.

Most importantly, I have the power to change my mindset. I am in control.

It’s perfectly acceptable not to keep up with all the new shows and latest controversial articles or news on social media. I made a conscious effort to limit how much I consume to have more time to create, and it was life-changing.

Maybe you think this is too hard for you. I think, once you realize how gratifying it is to get more of your creative work done, you will forget about most of those binge-worthy shows.

Let’s be clear, though, I was not addicted to TV or social media, but when I noticed I was spending two to three hours a day watching something, anything, just to have it on, I had to make a change.

Drastically limiting screen time

During weekdays, I cut out TV shows and pair down cell phone checking to spend more time reading. Books on writing, philosophy, business, comic books, and graphic novels are my favorites — a mix of entertainment and education.

My goal is to keep phone checking time to under an hour. I need to go in and promote my work on social media, but I only scroll for a few minutes and behave like the longer I stay there, the hotter it gets. I gotta get off before I get burned!

If I watch anything during the week, it’s a YouTube video or interview with someone giving advice on how they succeeded. Something I can listen to while drawing my comic strips or writing articles.

I take in content that will educate and inspire me to make more and stay motivated. The course I’m taking by Ayodeji Awosika on writing for Medium is perfect for listening to while creating.

There are lessons I view multiple times, so the information sticks. I believe taking in content that feeds your heart and mind is the best use of weekday time.

On the weekends, I’ll watch TV shows, but I limit them to series that are my favorites. Ones I can’t wait to see.

I no longer turn the TV on and leave it on to have something in the background to half-watch. Everything I consume is intentional. Two hours at the most. When the shows I wanted to see are done, I turn the boob tube off, back to the quiet.

I have more time to think, and calm helps improve my mood and outlook on life.

I feel happier

Making the decision to consume less TV and social media has brought more joy into my life. Without constantly “watching,” I’m spending more time “being” and paying attention to what I truly value in life: my family, writing, drawing, and good food.

The extra hours are now for writing articles or drawing new comic pages to learn and grow as an artist. I replaced screens with creative time.

I know that TV programs are fun to watch and can bring joy, but too much ends up making me feel jealous or depressed about not having enough money or material possessions in my own life. Cutting back on watching content needlessly gives me more peace. I don’t miss it.

All it took was making a decision to take in less and create more

The fact that you’re reading this is a testament to that choice. No more talking about getting creative work done. Now, I’m doing it consistently and reaping the benefits.

Spending more time creating work I love brings joy and a sense of fulfillment no screen can provide.

The Mandalorian Effect: If You’re Not Living by a Code, Your Mission in Life Will Most Likely Fail

Photo by Michael Marais on Unsplash

This is the way — to success

You are on a mission. A mission to reach success and live the life you’ve always dreamed of. If only you had a solid way of thinking and living to help guide you on your journey. It’s a big galaxy out there, but success is not as far, far away as it might seem.

My name is Din Djarin. I am a bounty hunter. You may know me as The Mandalorian. I’m here to impart my wisdom and moral code to you. Only if you choose to accept it.

Why you ask? After successfully delivering the child, baby Grogu, to Luke Skywalker of the Jedi Order, I’ve decided to take some time to put down my thoughts on success so that others can benefit. I have met others I thought lived by the Mandalorian way — such as never removing their helmet — but changed the rules to fit their personal needs.

With this in mind, I have come to understand you can start with beliefs you were taught as a child and build on them to create a code of your own to follow without fail. A code that helps you reach your goals with more ease. If you do not live by this code, I believe you will most likely fail.

As a Mandalorian, I have many sayings that I live by. Such as:

“Justice by single combat and always honoring one’s deals.” -The Mandalorians

I live by this but have also added new phrases that can help you on your travels towards prosperity. Whether it’s here or throughout the galaxy. If you are ready to level up, then follow my words.

Discipline is the true force

If you cannot consistently get the work done you vowed to complete, you will fail. No magic can save you. With life moving at lightspeed, you must practice discipline in all you do. Having the mindset to work consistently on your goals is the key. For that, you must decide to be a disciplined person — one who makes certain to complete all the tasks on their list no matter the circumstances.

I was trained from a young boy to follow what I was told by the elder Mandalorians. They taught me to listen and follow, but I have learned to take full responsibility for my life as a grown man. It is my job to take what they taught me, keep myself strong, and not blame them for my faults.

Only the discipline of adhering to daily training and hours of focused work will help you get where you want to go. Decide on why you are pursuing your mission. Make sure your “why” is compelling enough to get you up and rise to the challenge.

Establishing a routine gets you to your goals like riding a speeder bike — fast and direct

Find the same time each day to do the work. Use your disciplined mind to ensure you stick to a schedule you have planned out in advance. Do not throw your day together whenever it suits you. The morning is a productive time for getting thinking work done or exercising your body. When I rise, polishing my Mandalorian armor until it gleams is a cathartic practice. My mind is clear, and I am fully present with my thoughts as I plan the day ahead.

Utilize the technology of your planet and block off time in your day for what you must do. If you have trouble remembering, set a droid to remind you. Do what you must to make your routine into a habit, and your mind will expect to tackle everything on your list each day.

I believe in the mornings because no matter what planet I’m on, the sun rises and sets. Even if my days as a bounty hunter are unpredictable, at some point, the night will come, and I must sleep. Your routines will be accomplished if they are during times, you can always rely on.

Consistent practice sticks with you like an octopus attached to your ship

The truth is, you must practice improving. Remember that the amount of time does matter, but not as much as what you practice. Make sure it is of value.

Study the masters and discover what they practiced. Learn what you must to grow and then go all-in on your training every day.

Maneuvering the Razor Crest during a chase is definitely a stressful situation but, because of the flight training I acquired working with experienced pilots as a youth, knowing how and where to move to evade danger is now intuitive. I might not always get away, but from practice and experience, I have a fighting chance.

When you have focus, consistency, and patience, anything is possible. There were days when I thought Grogu would never get to the Jedi. I could not see the way forward. I know now that my singular focus on that goal, combined with consistent action, invariably led to a person who could assist us. My training helped us escape perilous situations, attracted a little luck, and manifested good fortune.

Photo by Jimmy Nguyen on Unsplash

All of this would not have been possible without living by a code I adhere to through good times and bad. Write out yours. Make decisions about how you will live your life and stick to them as closely as possible.

One day you will be able to share your code with others and tell them, “This is the way.”

Star Wars, The Mandalorian, and its characters are the property of Disney and Lucasfilm.

One Habit a Day- To feel like you again

Facing this pandemic while working through the anger, fear, and pain associated with the murders of black people in America, as a black male myself, is exhausting. There are times I want to be alone to process it all, and times I want to dive deeper into my work to escape.

There’s so much to do. Work responsibilities aren’t stopping, and focus must be given to them, whether we want to or not. I also know there’s so much that could be done to help the country right now.

Speaking out against systemic racism and police brutality through writing and art. Leaving the house, mask on, to protest with the masses. I want to be everywhere all the time.

It’s overwhelming. Sometimes, I can’t even remember who I am anymore.

If you’re feeling like me, I think it’s an excellent time to let some expectations go and to simplify your days. You cannot accomplish what you could back before the world drove off a cliff.

Complete one habit in the morning for a quick win

Definition of habit

1 : a settled tendency or usual manner of behavior.

- Her habit of taking a morning walk

Will you wake up early to write for an hour? Make that your one habit of conquering in the mornings to ignite your fire. Perhaps, you enjoy going for a run because exercise helps to clear your mind. Schedule the time when you will get up and put everything in place to make sure you do it.

Write your morning plan the night before and leave it out where you can see it when you wake up. Take out your running gear so you can put it on right away and take off.

Picking one habit that you know you can complete in the morning will give you the confidence to face these challenges. The challenges we’re all emotionally wading through each day. Give yourself as much space as you can each day to just be with it all.

An excerpt from the book by Nicolas Cole and Dr. Matthew Jones, “Slow Down, Wake Up,” states:

“You’re not supposed to function every single second of every single day at 100%. Anyone who tells you otherwise, including yourself, needs greater self-compassion.”

One is enough

If your one morning habit was all you could bring yourself to complete today, let that be okay.

Pick one thing to accomplish professionally and personally each day, then celebrate it.

For the days when you’re feeling down, let completing that one habit fill you with pride. It shows you can accomplish something important to you. You might find that it gives you the energy to work on another one of your things.

The point is to keep your expectations low right now in these difficult times. Do only what you can but plan to do at least one crucial daily habit to move your life or career forward.

One thing a day, can become a habit, help you process heavy emotions, and lead to more professional wins in the future.

When You're Tired and Hopeless

Here’s what you can do

I’m overwhelmed with emotions. In the middle of this pandemic, dealing with the killing of African-Americans like George Floyd and the protests surrounding it have me feeling exhausted. Hopeless.

Will the killing of my people ever end? It’s hard to admit that I don’t think so. Every year around this time, summer, we have black people getting killed and it’s gone on for years. Far before social media or even the local news covered any of this. I feel like the killing of black people is just a part of American life and always will be. I have to find ways to handle my anger.

Tanuki may be a raccoon but I think he’s onto something. Keeping your anger and frustration locked up inside could damage you more in the long run than letting it out now. Of course, I can’t endorse breaking plates — or breaking anything for that matter — but talking with friends and family about how you’re feeling right now is an excellent start.

Exercise is a beautiful way to lift the world off your shoulders. I highly recommend running or walking. If you can join protests and feel safe to do so, go out and walk with others to support your cause.

If protesting is not for you, donate to organizations online, make signs for friends who are going out to march, or even call and check up on your loved ones. They might need to vent or benefit from someone showing care for their situation.

It’s okay to be angry, afraid, and frustrated at this time. Find positive ways to release your stress and help others deal with theirs.

We’re all in this together

To Create, or Not to Create, While in Quarantine

That is the questions. Here’s the answer.

Illustration by Khalid Birdsong

Waking up at the crack of dawn to draw and write is no easy task, but I’ve grown accustomed to it. Today, on the other hand, I couldn’t help but feel the pull of the bed calling me back.

This is normal in regular times but much more powerful recently. Is it smarter to push through and get work done during these stressful times or give your body the extra rest it needs?

I chose to stay up and fumbled around, getting my coffee made. Doing marketing tasks like scheduling future social media posts, and writing possible gags for new comic strips — nothing all that heavy. When I start this way, it usually leads to turning my engine on and getting deeper into a creative drive. Where I’m eventually motivated to make more focused work like drawing or writing articles.

Perhaps you’re like me. Sandwiched between your desire to rest more and the awareness of all you could achieve during this forced-flexible time at home due to quarantine.

The two opposing questions floating around in my head always — Why not use this time to get more done? On the other hand — Why should I force myself to do anything during such a major pandemic?

The world needs your art during this time. Your perspective, voice, and experiences can help others. It’s incredibly important for you to find a way to put your work out there.

Here’s what I think is going on and what I discovered we can do to move forward towards our artistic goals.

Stop feeling guilty

Reading articles about famous people in the past, like Isaac Newton, who discovered the theory of relativity during a quarantine. Or, was that Einstein? Didn’t Shakespeare write a famous play while sheltering at home? I bet someone wrote a brilliant piece of classical music while forced to hide away from a plague. Something like that. I think all the motivational articles are getting jumbled up in my head.

The point is, they make you feel like this time of quarantine is not for letting it all go and slowing down, but for working harder. For creating something brand new and absolutely fantastic.

You start feeling concerned about yourself and, yes, guilty. Why can’t I make something earth-changing during this time? There are more opportunities to focus on smaller projects. Isn’t this what people will expect of a creative person?

There’s only one truth to accept.

Creatives get overwhelmed, frightened, and exhausted by world events, just like “normal” humans. We’re not above or beyond it only because we can escape to other places in our minds.

There are times when we make stuff with ease and times when we need to just sit and stare out into space to process it all. With nothing but a clean slate of negative thoughts in our heads and swirling mixed emotions in our hearts.

I want to have the freedom to work when my creative energy is turned on, but I’m afraid that if I get out of a routine, I’ll just stop and not make anything anymore. My momentum will hit a wall and seep into the gutter.

“Nothing can bring you peace but yourself.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

When I recognize this is what’s going on, I change how much I expect to get done. If you’re feeling this same guilt and overwhelm, schedule time to work but limit it. Instead of an hour, work for thirty-minutes.

There’s nothing wrong with cutting back.

Go ahead and be exhausted

Taking life a day at a time is something I need to improve on. I’ve seen more than ever how good days can be full of powerful, productive energy, and others are a slow drag to even begin.

This past weekend I was completely out of it. I felt like strings were attached to my limbs, and someone was pulling down on them, making it hard for me to move. Heavy body and mind issues plus plenty of chores to take care of around the house, forced me to make an important decision.

I needed to “do” less and let some things go. I’m just too tired.

Feeling exhausted right now is ok. It’s more than ok. You should expect it and give yourself some time off.

The only way to have productive days right now is to give yourself “processing time” to recharge on those tired, emotionally exhausting days.

Give yourself time to ease in

The struggle to produce content just happened to me today. This morning, in fact. What you’re reading is a result of gradually working my way to writing this article.

If you know that starting off not wanting to work but doing small things to help you transform into a “focused flow state productive mind,” is possible, you can have more confidence in the process.

“Smile, breathe, and go slowly.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

Celebrate your wins

You should definitely create your writing, art, and music while in quarantine. Take a hybrid approach by dedicating yourself to both your mental health through regular periods of rest and your need to create with longer than typical stretches of scheduled work times. This way, you know you have the time to gradually get into the groove.

“Life is 10 percent what you experience and 90 percent how you respond to it.” ~Dorothy M. Neddermeyer

Even if it seems like you only completed a few tasks, celebrate them. I had to tell myself, “Good Job!” today for getting something done, even though I was totally not in the mood at first. We could always do more.

Make good friends with patience and invite understanding into the mix. I know you will keep the creative momentum going and succeed in artistically expressing yourself.

Even while trapped inside this box, we call quarantine.

Do People Fall Off of Treadmills at the Gym?

I can’t be the only one…

I'm not a gym guy. I've tried several times, but I can't make it work for me the way my friends can. My mind gets overwhelmed and discombobulated every time I enter one and try to use the machines.

I know, making it a habit would probably help. Over time I'd memorize how to use each one and gain more confidence.

But I ask you, is it really worth it to commit to a gym?

Why are so many people willing to spend their time and energy moving their bodies, sweating like the crazy, stuck inside of a building?

"Spinning" on bikes that don't move. Running on treadmills that go nowhere while watching HGTV.

What are we, human hamsters?

It makes me want to walk around, yelling at people, "Stop working so hard to go nowhere! I know it's cold outside but have some balls. Get a real bike and ride! Ride to an actual place. Move forward. Go somewhere in life!"

To be fair, I can see going to a gym as a win if it's the only way you get motivated to exercise.

You get to drive, not walk or bike, to a building that is enclosed, shut off from the real world, where you can escape.

Like taking a trip to Exercise Land.

Walking in, you see beautiful in-shape bodies, a few that could use some work, and the gym wakes up your senses. And your jealousy.

"I gotta spin and lift too so I can look like all of these Greek Gods."

You smell the motivation in the air. Or is that athlete's foot? Either way, you're pumped.

That's how I try to feel when I enter a gym. It's usually one a friend invites me to in hopes I fall in love with the overpriced sweat house.

It all seems so magical. So, encouraging. Until I walk up to my nemesis.

The treadmill.

Theoretically, I should be able to step on it and just start walking. I'm sure that's how they were back in the olden' days.

Everything has to be so damn advanced now that I have to anxiously go through pressing buttons and choosing settings just to start.

I only want to get moving so I can go nowhere like everyone else.

The super-fit woman to the right of me who clearly has been running for seventeen straight hours tries not to watch me fumble around with the treadmill motherboard.

The guy on the left just gives a smirk. I bet he's thinking, "Look, a new guy. What a loser. He probably wastes all of his time running outside. In...nature."

Once I figure out a setting that will make the treadmill move, I can finally start walking. The choices don't end there, though.

I have to choose a TV station to watch. Here I am taking a stroll and channel surfing. Trying to enjoy the multi-tasking, first-world problem of what to watch while breathing hard and sweating.

After going through all the channels, you know where I end up.

HGTV.

Walking turns to jogging. The feeling is incredible. The treadmill surface is softer than the hard concrete, so I get the false sense that I can run farther than I ever can out in the elements.

I'm jogging while watching a couple remodel their mid-century modern home. Continually checking how many imaginary miles I've completed here in this building of "No pain, no gain."

One mile. I ran one mile. It feels like ten. Probably because I'm still in the same place I started.

Slowing down to a walk again seems like an excellent idea. Change up the pace, like interval training.

Boy, was I wrong.

As I ease back into a walk, I start feeling dizzy. Do you feel like this on one of these things too?

Like a fool, I blame it on HGTV.

Changing the channel will help. I reach for the channel button, the room spins, and I fall forward onto the treadmill.

Or is it back as the moving surface pulls me down and onto the floor?

What do you know, the treadmill surface stops moving. No buttons to press. I just had to fall on my face.

The lady on the right looks surprised for a second but can't stop running, she's too close to completing her five thousand miles.

The guy on the left keeps running but yells out, "You okay, dude?!"

I get myself up slowly, give a shy wave to my super athletic neighbors, and hobble away in shame.

My knee hurts from the fall but not as much as—let's say it together—my pride.

Please tell me falling off treadmills is something that happens at gyms regularly.

It can't only be my failed attempt at running in place.