What Getting Out of Your Comfort Zone Really Takes

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Here’s a hint, it’s not only courage.

I have a friend who always talks about making significant changes in his life but never does. He says he wants to change careers and move to another city, but he avoids taking steps to make the leap.

Why?

I know you’re thinking he’s just afraid of the unknown, but I believe it’s more than that.

After spending the past twenty years of my life moving around and even living overseas in Japan, I know what motivated me to step out of my comfort zone.

I wish I could say it was because I’m so brave, and “risk” is my middle name. That’s not true at all. I’m actually afraid of change and scared of the unknown.

What drives me forward — and what my friend could use more of–is curiosity.

One of my goals is to ignite this spirit of curiosity when teaching my students and get them to ask more questions. Good questions lead to knowing more, seeing more, and ultimately experiencing more than what you have inside your bubble of safety.

Here’s the thing — even though it feels nice and warm in that bubble, your determination to discover more and get those questions answered will shove your fears aside. You’ll have the confidence to burst out of your comfort zone.

Fears will still be there, just not barking at you as loud as they were. You’ll have a reason that propels you forward and gives you the confidence to face uncertainty.

Curiosity charges up your “why” with more power than your fears.

Not only in making life moves, but in establishing new relationships. Suppose you’re looking to meet new friends or start dating again after a tough breakup. In that case, it’s been proven curiosity can be the key to personal growth.

Their study concludes that the degree to which people are curious actively influences their personal growth opportunities and the level of intimacy that develops when they meet someone new.

-Patricia Donovan

Sometimes “What if?” Looking back on my life, what if I was never curious about Japanese culture and language? I would never have had the balls to move there to teach English.

My interest in the Japanese language was strong. Still, I’ve always been too shy to speak other languages easily in front of people.

As the only foreigner in my town, living in Japan forced me to learn Japanese and speak it often. I had to push past my fears and face the embarrassment of mispronouncing words in front of native speakers.

What if, when another American teacher of English invited me to hang out with her new Japanese girlfriends and mentioned, “They’re both single!” and If I had said, “No, thanks.”

I would never have met my wife.

I needed to follow the curiosity and interest in who her friends were. Of course, they might have been people I didn’t get along well with, and we could have had a terrible time together. It was a risk I will take because I was curious.

Curiosity leads me overseas and to meeting the woman of my dreams. Travel and relationships aren’t easy, but they’re an example of how your life can change if you are interested in the wider world.

What about my friend who’s afraid of making changes? I wouldn’t give him unsolicited advice, but here are the benefits of curiosity I would share if he ever asks.

When you live with an active sense of curiosity:

You will never get bored

Having an interest in many new things means learning and adjusting regularly. Yes, the positive side effect is never getting bored.

How could you when you constantly have new experiences and relationships to navigate and explore?

If you ever run out of interest, ask more questions.

You will learn to embrace discomfort

There’s always going to be discomfort in any decision or path you choose to take. If you say it’s too scary and do nothing, you’ll have to deal with the discomfort of not reaching your goals.

When you decide to go for it, there’s also discomfort, but for something you really want.

Choose the discomfort that gets you closer to your dreams.

If you want to move forward in life, you’d better become familiar with and embrace the fear.

You will approach life with an open mind as a learner and observer

Living with curiosity also means you will have an easier time remembering information and a more accessible time learning skills connected with your new pursuits. As you learn more, you have a deeper understanding of how things work and why people are the way they are. You grow.

This will help open your mind and create even more questions you want answers to down the line. Each part of what you do in business and life will take on new meaning.

Conclusion

Live with curiosity. It hurts me to have friends who are not interested in experiencing more of what life offers just because of their fear. When you’re aware of your comfort zone, know that you can choose to step out and do more.

All you have to do is to be curious and follow where your questions lead you.