5 Truths The “Queer Eye” Hosts Can Help You Discover About Living Authentically

And how to put them into practice.

Photo courtesy of Wikimedia Commons.

Discovering what you need to improve your life and then taking steps to actually do it are two different things entirely.

No one would argue values like practicing self-love, having confidence, and pride in yourself are essential for a fulfilling life.

So, why can’t most of us figure out how to be that person?

The power of the Netflix streaming show “Queer Eye” is how it jolts regular everyday people back into who they know they are and helps them discover how to be fully present in the world. I’m all for those ideals, but I’ll admit—and don’t hate me here—at first, I wasn’t sure if the show could be for me.

After all, I’m a straight Black male who’s not even into fashion. Isn’t that the main reason to watch the show—for the seemingly magical makeovers?

We wanted something uplifting to watch as a family and their season visiting Japan pulled us in, like a top-rated sushi restaurant on Saturday evening. I kept looking over my shoulder, afraid someone imaginary might catch me watching and laugh, but as the first episode progressed, I began falling in love.

I was pleasantly surprised by the life-changing emotional makeovers. The hosts take everything deeper by getting to know the person they’re helping and showing how much they care. It’s more than just about your outward appearance.

You get to recognize some of what we all are facing internally and watch the guests heal or move forward through heaps of fear and pain.

The “Fab Five” cast members each take on a different part of the transformation. They show us the secrets to living our truth. Here’s what you can learn from them and how to put them into action.

1. You’re not alone in suffering

“Queer Eye” gives us Karamo Brown, a Black psychotherapist and TV host who steps in to help you remember all the beautiful parts of life you forgot or are turning your back on regularly.

Karamo sits down and has quiet and heartfelt conversations with the person nominated by a family member or friend for the show and works out with them how to overcome their sadness, laziness, and lack of motivation they’re going through.

Seeing a Black man comfortably and calmly talking about feelings with each person is delightfully refreshing. The fact that he’s in a private setting and not in front of a studio audience helps it feel authentic like he genuinely cares about helping them grow.

I’ve done therapy in the past, but this show reminds me of the lightbulb moments you can have when talking to someone trained to hear and help with your issues. You know you don’t have to carry everything alone.

Takeaway: Help is out there, and with it, you can learn to let go of what’s holding you back. Make a point to find a therapist or talk with someone close to you openly on a regular basis.

2. Your personal space at home matters

If you live in a sh*thole, you’re going to feel like sh*t.

Bobby Berks understands what it means to have a space that lifts your spirits. He’s an interior designer with a heart of solid gold and willing to re-organize your room to make you feel safe and creative again.

His job is to re-arrange your place, so you get the chance to improve your interpersonal relationships, and feel rich and relaxed at the same time. Of course, when you have guests over, they feel your personality radiate out from your colorful decor, creating an atmosphere of joy.

Takeaway: Make time to clean up your home to give space for everything to breathe. Find ways to add color and cute small touches to your home like photos, throw pillows, and rugs. If you can afford to hire an interior designer—do it. They can take what they learn about you to create spaces that make you feel healthier and happier when you’re at home.

3. Clothes help make you look and feel fabulous

Tan France is an English fashion designer of South Asian descent, he is here to give you tips on what clothes you should wear and the ones you should avoid. His mastery of discovering what cuts and colors work well for your body type is phenomenal.

I’m not a big clothes shopper, and not good at noticing what works well on me. So, watching Tan help people looks like magic. My sister has helped me find and take chances on new styles in the past, and I’ve always appreciated her help and eye for fashion.

Seeing the closet of new clothes, picked exclusively for the person in that particular episode of the show, always gets me jealous. I want a designer to help me learn how to dress to impress.

Takeaway: Take more risks on new clothes. You might not have a designer with you to go shopping, but take a friend or family member who can pick out something they think could work. Sometimes you just need someone else to encourage you.

4. Cooking and eating well is a magical gift of life

The kitchen is the center of a home where we not only learn to cook, but how to socialize and work together as a family and as human beings.

Antoni Porowski, a Canadian food expert and TV personality, gets into your kitchen to get rid of unhealthy food and teaches how to cook and connect with yourself. His recipes create a healthier lifestyle and, for some, a deeper connection to their family members.

Food not only fills your belly, but helps you understand your culture while you create something delicious by hand. Cooking and eating together is the way humans have been cooperating since the beginning of time. Learning to cook makes you a part of history—your family’s and the world’s.

Takeaway: Learn to cook. Start with one dish you can make for dinner. Improve on it and have it as your go-to dish when needed. You can make it for yourself, as a way to help your family, or to impress a new friend. The pride you’ll feel for being able to cook a delicious meal will boost your zest for life.

5. Your hairstyle reflects your personality

I shave all of my hair off and enjoy going completely bald, so I’m not sure what that says about me as a person.

Back when I had hair, I remember trying different afro styles to see how it made me look and feel. Hairstyles have personality and can change your appearance.

It’s important to take them seriously.

My personal favorite of the five, Jonathan van Ness, is a hairdresser bursting with personality who focuses on your image by giving you haircuts that matches your personality and facial structure. They excel at pampering your skin and your confidence, so you glow for yourself and to others.

I’m always surprised with how guests on the show believe they don’t need to update their hair or makeup and want to stick to what works. Or, what’s comfortable. Watching Jonathan break them out of their shell and become almost like new, even uplifts the way they carry themselves.

Takeaway: Have the courage to talk with a hairdresser or barber about a style that will flatter how you look and feel right now in your life. Be open to suggestions and making changes and then see how it improves your whole being.

Get help from people who care

When you watch “Queer Eye” you discover it’s not just a reality makeover; it’s a game-changing show.

It offers guidance, confidence, acceptance, tolerance, and help getting out of your comfort zone. You wake up to finally having the life you always wanted.

Some of you out here will be able to watch and immediately make changes you know will improve your quality of life. Most of us, will need some help.

One of the biggest truths of the show is if we want to make real change in our life, we need help from people who care. Find, hire, or ask for help and most importantly, stay open to growing as a person.

You have the power to become a game-changer for your own life right now.

Want more? If you’re struggling with making authentic work, click here to join my (free) email list, and through comics, articles about culture, and living your truth, you can discover how to upgrade your mindset and share your creative writing and art with the world.